Mynk's Mind

alright, lots of gaming stuff recently. Lets start off with some light hearted good ol' advertising

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REMEMBER TO COMMENT AFTER READING... I REALLY NEED YOUR HELP

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i have recently been gazing upon my past, peering into 'teh future' and acquainting myself with my current situation.

so recently i was hugged on facebook by Annie Shi, which probably meant nothing to her, and meant nothing in general either, but it reminded me of lots of thoughts. To quickly introduce you to this girl, she is one of the only two girls i have ever been serious about in my whole life, and the only one i still don't regret to date (oh btw. the feelings were obviously not returned, like any other love life thing that has ever happened to me). so i got into very deep thought, about everything that had happened in my life, about all the girls gone by. and even friends. I've lost and gained lots of friends in this life, and much of the loses i regret when i look back. i leave those regrets behind though, i do not with to continue on with them. i wish to start a fresh.

i miss those days a lot, but i wish i could go back and change the past. but i cant, what i can change is the present. but that isn't very bright either. for example today, i completely lost Wilma's friendship forever, which btw... is the second girl i was serious about, who i do regret having ANY feelings for. also lately, i have lost trust, respect, and friendship from those that i held very very close and dear to myself, u know the type of friends that you would take a bullet for, well it doesn't help when you find out they shot the bullet themselves.

if you are reading this....
Edith, angel, Victoria, Winston, and almost everyone else who knows who they are... well, thanks for reading. i don't think i need to say any more.

but well, one good thing about the present is that my life is bliss. and not agonizing killer bliss, just pure bliss. i know i made it sound bad in the previous paragraphs, but as i said... i have left those regrets behind. with my latest loss as far as relationships go, which only two external sources know of... (other than the person herself) , both of which happen to have a my opera blog as well; anyways as i was saying, with my latest loss in my love life, i have somewhat given up on it. not given up on love and feelings, but instead given up the fake created need for such a thing. i have let go of all the untrue emotions i summoned for others.



and as though i haven't had enough of a shot at bliss already, my current group of friends (look at post title 'still looking for that special someone') is one of the best i could ever have. and i have learned, wherever i go in life, i might make some mistakes, choose the wrong friends, or group, or crowd do hang out with... but in the end an angel would appear for me (thank you Edith) and start leading me in the right direction in life. and then, i just pull through by myself. realize what i have, and just smile to my own self. as far as smiling goes though, right now there is a tear down my eye. a tear of joy.

tears of joy reminds me.... i once lost what i thought of the best friend i could ever have, and well... recently, things have been happening to him, and i wish i could help him... but it just isn't the same anymore. i want to help him, but our friendship has been long destroyed, and i feel guilt and sorrow together not being able to help him. oh well, we talked, and we both realized our lost friendship, cried a little, got back... but its not the same. Andy, i want it back. i hope you're listening. thanks man.

as for the future, well, i don't wish to lose what i already have. hopefully the people i have will stay with me, they know who they are, I don't need names.
(PS Edith. we're still friends, don't let little speed-bumps bring our Lamborghini friendship to a
complete stop)
thanks guys. you're the best.

as far the furture goes, i dont know whats going to happen. but when i find out, you'll be the first to know (since u read this blog). I know there's going to be ups and downs, and no, life never balances out, but you know what, I'll pull through. dont worry, i wont kill myself. Right now, the future is two months of summer, and turst me, in two months, a lot can happen. I'm not sure if i like life or not at the speed that i get it at these days, but living in the fast lane, it can get to you sometimes... everything just seems so, perfect. No, thats not the word im looking for, but i shall use it anyways. i hope you guys understand, at least those of you that are supposed to. and oh yeah ps. Dilan, if you're reading this, ur a bro too man. same for the rest of you that know i hold you dear (i dont wish to mention more names, the more names i mention, the worse people i dont mention will feel)

oh well, my future is today consits of another blog post, and the journey to discover what the convergence is all about. Yes, i am to read the book I bought in its release week, yet still havent read. oh well, with a tear down my eye, and a smile on my face, off into the future i go by leaving you with:

currently playlist:
Just want you to know - backstreet boys
Faint - Linkin Park
Cover of Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen - Gloria Ng

ps. speical mentions:
David Zhu. We'll, our friendship started today, and i hope it goes amazingly well and not like many of the ones mentioned above. Ps. I have actually mentioned him in one more post, use the blog serach feature and find out. and ps ps. this is not the same david as david liu. there are two of them.
Ashar Q. Bekkause he's too Kkool for just one post! or just one Kk
Ahsley Lai. Because she is, ahshley lai.
Annie Shi. for being a great friend while it was.
Dilani L. because she is also cool, and reads this blog, and i have this random story to tell you guys about her and engilsh class... but some other day.
Others are mentioned above, and those that are not, are in my heart forever

allright, so 11:08, 8 minutes past my bedtime for exam times.
tomorrow i have an art exam, that I'm totally going to wing, and its at noon
hopefully, i get enough study in the morning, because i dont think i got enough today

teh reason: I hung out today too. against the wishes of my mother, i brought friends home (friends not including glow, cuz she was too busy studying for french! READ HER BLOG FOR MORE). we played guitar hero, halo and stuff like that. cept megan was bored because she's more of a rpg gamer than a fps gamer. WE'RE SORRY MEGGAN

as you may notice my current status is introverted bitch. that is refering to a spesfic person who is an introvert, or at least calls himself one... yet is a bitch to many. I dont c how that works but oh well. oh and I'm not hatin on him, he's like one of the bestest friends i ever had.

anyways i got to see David's house today, and its full of like $2,000 worth of games.. like wtf, why are u spending so much money on gaming when there are so many better things to spend on.. oh wait, you always have money and spend ons tuff anyways... then why do you call yourself poor! WTF. but no, i dont critize you, i understand ur current situation, but you should probably save up a little no?
ps. still friends david, no offence or anything.. ur still cool!

now onto my second point of this hangout post.... guilt. since that introvert was being a bitch, he said some pretty mean things, though he obviously only meant it as a joke. some people though, dont know how to take a joke. and others critized him of doing so. now being an introvert, he obviously cant accept critisism, and therefore felt very guilty. i hope it gets better for him, because that critisizing was from a very speical person that he didnt want to make a bad imperssion on. oh well, hopefully that special person donest think of them badly.

notice how im not mentionting any names... i wonder why. oh well, im going to get back to coffee and more posts, since as i said, i have a caffine hangover (phrase copyright andy)

currently listenin to: Tokyo drift
Mood: meh.

ps. omg how could i forget, i had the english exam today, and i forgot to tell you about in the post based on exam + hangout. anyways yeah it was kinda easy. well you see, teh questions were easy, but teh answers werent! oh well, i finshed... ill tell you guys how i did when i get my mark updates.