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My Poems and Other Life Issues by Christy

Posts tagged with "life"

STICKY POST

Thank You, Mom

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You gave me life. You gave me love.
You gave me wings.

How can I ever begin to tell you how important
you are to my life. You are my confidante, my teacher,
my friend. Everything I am is because of you.

You gave me a world adorned with sunbeams and castles
in the sand. You gave me time to dream and reason
to believe in myself. You were always there to cheer
me on and to wrap me in hugs when I needed it the
most. You taught me compassion and courage and how to
love.

You gave of yourself so freely and expected nothing in return.
For this and more, I will be forever grateful.

You gave me what I needed in life to learn and grow into the
person I am today. I want you to always know that no matter
where I go or what I do in life, I will never forget the lessons
you taught me and the wings you gave me to fly.

I want you to remember that I will always be there for you.
I will always take care of you

I will always love you.


By: © CMN 1997




Great Blessing

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If I had one more day, I would watch the sunrise and spend the day with you, holding hands, walking in the park, kissing under the weeping willow tree, eating our melting ice cream cones, laughing like little children. You would buy me my favorite flower and we would remember all the times we spent together on the beach running in the waves.

If I had one more day, I would gather my children and read them their favorite children's story, "Goodnight Moon". I would tuck them into bed and tell them all the things I wish I would have said to them before. I would tell them all my hopes and dreams for them and what great children they have been. I would hug and kiss them goodnight and say I love you. I would gently close their doors and say a quiet goodbye as a tear fell from my eye.

If I had one more day, I would hug my family and forgive all past hurts and disappointments. I would remember only the good and thank them for my life. I would wish them only great happiness in their lives. I would cry with them as we remember there will be no more birthdays or Christmas times together, only memories. Memories are precious and should be shared. I would kiss each member of my family and thank them for being a part of my life. In each and every way they have brought me happiness and I thank them for that.

If I had one more day, what a great blessing that would be to lay in your arms and watch the sun set. We would hold each other tight and remember our past, our friends, family, everyone that came in and out our lives, You would kiss me on my cheek and say it's okay to leave, I understand you must go. I would look at you with such love and whisper quietly, I love you as my last breath escaped me and you would hold me tight as I would quietly slip away.
If I had one more day.

By: © CMN 2008

A Beautiful Friend Sent This to Me - Thank you Brian - The Old Man and the Dog (Wonderful Story)

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The Old Man and the Dog
by Catherine Moore

"Watch out! You nearly broad sided that car!" My father yelled at me.

"Can't you do anything right?"
Those words hurt worse than blows. I turned my head toward the elderly man in the seat beside me, daring me to challenge him. A lump rose in my throat as I averted my eyes. I wasn't prepared for another battle.

"I saw the car, Dad. Please don't yell at me when I'm driving." My voice was measured and steady, sounding far calmer than I really felt.

Dad glared at me, then turned away and settled back.
At home I left Dad in front of the television and went outside to collect my thoughts.
Dark, heavy clouds hung in the air with a promise of rain. The rumble of distant thunder seemed to echo my inner turmoil.

What could I do about him?

Dad had been a lumberjack in Washington and Oregon.
He had enjoyed being outdoors and had reveled in pitting his strength against the forces of nature. He had entered grueling lumberjack competitions, and had placed often. The shelves in his house were filled with trophies that attested to his prowess.

The years marched on relentlessly. The first time he couldn't lift a heavy log, he joked about it; but later that same day I saw him outside alone, straining to lift it. He became irritable whenever anyone teased him about his advancing age, or when he couldn't do something he had done as a younger man.

Four days after his sixty-seventh birthday, he had a heart attack.
An ambulance sped him to the hospital while a paramedic administered CPR to keep blood and oxygen flowing. At the hospital, Dad was rushed into an operating room. He was lucky; he survived.

But something inside Dad died. His zest for life was gone. He obstinately refused to follow doctor's orders. Suggestions and offers of help were turned aside with sarcasm and insults. The number of visitors thinned, then finally stopped altogether. Dad was left alone.

My husband, Dick, and I asked Dad to come live with us on our small farm. We hoped the fresh air and rustic atmosphere would help him adjust. Within a week after he moved in, I regretted the invitation.
It seemed nothing was satisfactory. He criticized everything I did. I became frustrated and moody.
Soon I was taking my pent-up anger out on Dick. We began to bicker and argue. Alarmed, Dick sought out our pastor and explained the situation. The clergyman set up weekly counseling appointments for us. At the close of each session he prayed, asking God to soothe Dad's troubled mind. But the months wore on and God was silent. Something had to be done and it was up to me to do it.

The next day I sat down with the phone book and methodically called each of the mental health clinics listed in the Yellow Pages. I explained my problem to each of the sympathetic voices that answered. In vain. Just when I was giving up hope, one of the voices suddenly exclaimed, "I just read something that might help you! Let me go get the article." I listened as she read. The article described a remarkable study done at a nursing home. All of the patients were under treatment for chronic depression. Yet their attitudes had improved dramatically when they were given responsibility for a dog.

I drove to the animal shelter that afternoon. After I filled out a questionnaire, a uniformed officer led me to the kennels. The odor of disinfectant stung my nostrils as I moved down the row of pens. Each contained five to seven dogs. Long-haired dogs, curly-haired dogs, black dogs, spotted dogs all jumped up, trying to reach me. I studied each one but rejected one after the other for various reasons too big, too small, too much hair. As I neared the last pen a dog in the shadows of the far corner struggled to his feet, walked to the front of the run and sat down. It was a pointer, one of the dog world's aristocrats. But this was a caricature of the breed. Years had etched his face and muzzle with shades of gray. His hipbones jutted out in lopsided triangles. But it was his eyes that caught and held my attention. Calm and clear, they beheld me unwaveringly.

I pointed to the dog. "Can you tell me about him?" The officer looked, then shook his head in puzzlement.

"He's a funny one. Appeared out of nowhere and sat in front of the gate. We brought him in, figuring someone would be right down to claim him. That was two weeks ago and we've heard nothing. His time is up tomorrow." He gestured helplessly.

As the words sank in I turned to the man in horror. "You mean you're going to kill him?"

"Ma'am," he said gently, "that's our policy. We don't have room for every unclaimed dog."

I looked at the pointer again. The calm brown eyes awaited my decision. "I'll take him," I said.

I drove home with the dog on the front seat beside me. When I reached the house I honked the horn twice. I was helping my prize out of the car when Dad shuffled onto the front porch.

"Ta-da! Look what I got for you, Dad!" I said excitedly.

Dad looked, then wrinkled his face in disgust. "If I had wanted a dog I would have gotten one. And I would have picked out a better specimen than that bag of bones. Keep it! I don't want it" Dad waved his arm scornfully and turned back toward the house.

Anger rose inside me. It squeezed together my throat muscles and pounded into my temples.

"You'd better get used to him, Dad. He's staying!" Dad ignored me. "Did you hear me, Dad?" I screamed. At those words Dad whirled angrily, his hands clenched at his sides, his eyes narrowed and blazing with hate.

We stood glaring at each other like duelists, when suddenly the pointer pulled free from my grasp. He wobbled toward my dad and sat down in front of him. Then slowly, carefully, he raised his paw.

Dad's lower jaw trembled as he stared at the uplifted paw. Confusion replaced the anger in his eyes. The pointer waited patiently. Then Dad was on his knees hugging the animal.

It was the beginning of a warm and intimate friendship. Dad named the pointer Cheyenne. Together he and Cheyenne explored the community. They spent long hours walking down dusty lanes. They spent reflective moments on the banks of streams, angling for tasty trout. They even started to attend Sunday services together, Dad sitting in a pew and Cheyenne lying quietly at his feet.

Dad and Cheyenne were inseparable throughout the next three years. Dad's bitterness faded, and he and Cheyenne made many friends. Then late one night I was startled to feel Cheyenne's cold nose burrowing through our bed covers. He had never before come into our bedroom at night. I woke Dick, put on my robe and ran into my father's room. Dad lay in his bed, his face serene. But his spirit had left quietly sometime during the night.

Two days later my shock and grief deepened when I discovered Cheyenne lying dead beside Dad's bed. I wrapped his still form in the rag rug he had slept on. As Dick and I buried him near a favorite fishing hole, I silently thanked the dog for the help he had given me in restoring Dad's peace of mind.

The morning of Dad's funeral dawned overcast and dreary. This day looks like the way I feel, I thought, as I walked down the aisle to the pews reserved for family. I was surprised to see the many friends Dad and Cheyenne had made filling the church. The pastor began his eulogy. It was a tribute to both Dad and the dog who had changed his life. And then the pastor turned to Hebrews 13:2. "Be not forgetful to entertain strangers."

"I've often thanked God for sending that angel," he said.

For me, the past dropped into place, completing a puzzle that I had not seen before: the sympathetic voice that had just read the right article...

Cheyenne's unexpected appearance at the animal shelter. . .his calm acceptance and complete devotion to my father. . .and the proximity of their deaths. And suddenly I understood. I knew that God had answered my prayers after all. Life is too short for drama & petty things, so laugh hard, love truly and forgive quickly. Live While You Are Alive. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. Forgive now those who made you cry. You might not get a second time.

Today is my Son Jason's Anniversary - He lived to be 18 months old. He was the happiest baby you could ever meet.

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This is for someone on here who has answered all my prayers.

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My Life

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I am just sitting here after having another seizure because the local
neighborhood decided to celebrate the end of Summer with fireworks and
wondering Is this It?

Is this my Life?

Do I go on living like this or try a surgery which I may not survive or
may do some permanent damage.

I don't know. I am tired, weary and frustrated.

I am tired of having these seizures every day because the tumors won't
stop growing in my brain.

Sometimes I do wish it would all end and I would be able to take the
angel's hand and meet my son.

Then I think of my children here on earth and do not want to leave them.

It's a hard choice, do I stay or go. It's a choice I must make soon.

Can You Keep Your Emotions In Check?

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All the things that I have been through, I better find a way to keep a positive outlook on things, or I would go crazy.
You Have Your Emotions in Check
You are an incredibly stable and happy person.
Ever consider being a therapist?
You have figured out how to keep a positive outlook, no matter what.
You don't have an easier life than anyone else. You just have figured things out a little more.

A Poem I wrote several years ago

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Please Forgive Me

I am so sorry I hurt you. What can I say or do to express the regret I feel for hurting the one person whom I love most in this world. How can I ask you to forgive me?

Before I met you, I was an empty shell of existence. You came into my life and captured my heart and soul. You wrapped your love around me and nourished my spirit. You lifted me up when I was down. You gave me strength when I needed it the most.

What would I do without you. You are such an important part of my life. I can't imagine my life without you in it. You are the essence of my being. You are my love.

Please forgive me and never stop loving me. For I will love you with every breath I take. Now and forever.

I will love you always.


By: © CMN 2002

This is what happens to a child after years of abuse

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Shattered Existence

Walls of resistance I have built around me anger in my eyes.

Slight touches and kisses I'm afraid of love I can't accept.

You did this to me.

I tried to escape. I tried to hide.

If only you knew how what you did has affected me, my life, my world.

You would see my shattered existence.


By: © CMN 2001

In Memory of My Son Jason - 4/20/90 - 10/23/91

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Gift From Above

You came into this world
with such wonder and awe.
Our eyes met as your tiny
hand curled around mine.

A tear fell down my cheek
when I held you in my arms.
You were so beautiful,
so loving and kind

I kissed you softly
and held you so tight.
I never knew I could
feel so much love.

I stroked your hair and
rocked your gently to sleep.
You were my precious
gift from above.




By: © CMN
December 2009
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