Come back

This afternoon, I sat nodding by a desk for a little while. When I was sleeping fitfully, I waked up with a start. I turned out to have a dream and , I know the reason why I waked up suddenly because in my dream, I saw my friend's nickname appeared on computer screen. I felt very glad and surprised. Laughable ! I was listening to music and I don't know when I fell asleep .hihi! the name of the song is Disappear and it's very good, so, I usually listen. I might have slept because of its interestingness. Oh, I don't know anymore. When I was sleeping, I felt very strange and ambiguous. I don't often take an afternoon nap, because I'm acquainted with not sleeping, thus I can stay up late very well . It seems to be stupid in other people's thinking but I don't know why I do so. maybe it's one of my habits. of course, it's difficult to break the habit of a lifetime. And the same to me! I even stayed up late until 4 a.m to study or with my friend to talk . I know it's not useful for health but I still do it because I like doing it and I can't give up. I seem to be a stupid and stubborn girl. hehe. For example, I've ever been gotten a sound thrasing by my father when I was 12 years old because I went out with my friends without my parent's permission.He made me lay prostrated in a bed and then he spanked my bottom with a big cane. He flailed so strongly that the cane broken into several sections. But I didn't break into tears at all. I felt very painful but I couldn't cry and I didn't know why... Maybe I'm used to withstanding pains. Thus don't I feel anything. I have a silly habit is that whenever my arms or feet are sore, I always endeavour to beat them more until I can't bear anymore. Because I think that only by doing such a thing , my pains will recover completely and fastly. Maybe it's a stupid thinking in other people's eyes but I like it. I can bear every pain because I try to habituate myself to stand pains. I'm a good girl, am not I?

A glass of milk tea for the whole day immersed. A prayer for the entire month peacefully. Best wishes for a lifetime of happiness and a half life than full integrity.

Frankly, I'm listening to music but I neither think of it nor understand it. I don't know why. I don't think about anything, except one thing which you never know.All is over,! I ought to have written a word: heart but I don't know why I make it become a word : hurt. I'm very stupid. Maybe it's the reason why I don't want to love anyone because I fear that I'll hurt that person or I'll be hurt by them. I don't believe anyone and their love. I think about the end of love before thinking about the beautiful beginning of love, I don't know why,why, and why. I just know that I was not born in this world to think about it or do it. Thus don't I want to understand why, at least now. Today elapse very slowly and I can't bear the silence around me anymore. It is very terrible ! Today, the weather became colder than yesterday , and I really want to see you once again but I can't. I don't like, don't hate or love you but I remember you. It's merely because you've ever been a friend of mine.Maybe it's the best answer now. There're five minutes it's going to sound 12 o'clock. Wishing me sleep well!!!

Maybe our opinion don't accord with each other. Or rather, your thinking is altogether different from mine. We have differing views. You may think about me as a naive girl, even very childish. I know it by my way of talking to you . But in fact, all thing that I said to you is my true mood, my thinking. You may not think so, and It's a natural thing. I can see. Anyhow, I'm so sorry for all I ever did. It might be to bother you?

If only she could forget it all. That is a real happiness for her. If only he could bring her happiness once again, but in fact, there's nothing she can get from him. Because he is too cool toward her. Even, he has brought tears to her eyes for many times. He doesn't know that whenever she is blue, the first person whom she is thinking about is him. Whensoever she sees it, she thinks of him. She doesn't want to hear the whys and the wherefores, she just wants to know what does he think about her or how does he consider her ? It's too hard for both of them to be in agreement. It's merely because of a big difference between her and him. Maybe he can't understand her throughly and conversely. He has ever brought her through the fear and brought her to her senses. He helped her out of difficulties. He has ever been her moral support. What supported her was his smile, belief , even reprimands. Outwardly, she is very strong but inwardly, she is really fragile. However, he doesn't know it,and that's the reason why he always makes her sad.