Just Passing Through

I see the reflection in my spirit. The reflection is not pretty. A soul, a badly bent and broken soul, with too many wounds, battered into silence before the world. When the Enemy condemns the evil world, I can't claim to be separate from it.

Billions of electrons locked into my words, but words mean nothing if there is no manifestation to match them.

Looking back, I see all the times when some golden moment passed me by -- I didn't know what gold was. A blessed gift from the Father, a chance to stand in for Him in the life of some other. But I stood dumb, frozen by the misery of my own heart. The pain of others was drowned out by my own pain, thinking of myself and my own needs.

I call to the Father, begging Him to let me die. Let that painful knot of sorrow be lost on the Cross. Take away my sense of self; let me be lost in Your own Presence. Take me away, and fill the husk with yourself. When I look into the mirror, let me see the Crown of Thorns.