Jurjen's world

Sometime ago my mother told me she heard from the neighbours about some guy making trouble in the neighbourhood. It was a heavy guy with a dog. He was walking the dog on a footpath between some fields where many people walk the dog. It's also a path where many people cycle, which officially isn't allowed and it may sometimes be a little of a problem with dogs walking around.

So the the heavy guy was walking there with his dog and then a older woman came by on the bike. He shouted at her to get off her bicycle. She did, but when she was a little further apparently she again got on her bike and continued cycling. The guy was apparently angry about this and he yelled at her to get of the bike. Apparently this sounded so intimidated to the lady that she again gone off the bicycle.

The guy went to the lady to argue about this with her. He was that mad and upset about her behaviour that he put out a knife and treated her with it. He also stabbed in her tubes with the knife. Some other lady went to this trouble to try to pursue him to stop overreacting like this. She was also treated by the knife.

Later when speaking about the incident with other people they (the neighbours) learned that he also treated a bailiff to throw him of the balcony when he didn't leave them alone (he and his parents). I don't know how serious that treat was, I guess bailiffs get treats like that every day. And beside that he also treated someone of social security and destroyed some office materials out of anger. He was in jail for that a couple of days.

After some time it became clear that this heavy guy was a classmate of me at primary school. Back then it was already a fat boy. And he sure had to face the consequences of that, because he was bullied very often. He did not had many friends (if any) and a lot of his classmates would be bullying him because he was the fat looser. I can't deny I joined in sometimes in that, I guess you was a looser too if you didn't and what did I know. Okey it's not an excuse, but at least I sure wasn't the worst.
Even back then he could sometimes very unexpectedly become aggressive towards his bullies. Not that anything really bad would happen.

I don't know what he had to endure on high school, I went to another school and never saw him after that. I guess things continued in the way they started at primary. I don't know, but I don't think he became a very popular guy all the sudden.

At the moment this story came up about him being aggressive and all, people look at him as a villain. Perhaps he is, but I seriously doubt if you can say things that easy. I think the guy has always been lonely, he is always been attacked by its environment and he sometimes became aggressive to 'defend' himself. He has a dog, perhaps the first real friend he ever had, he protects his dog against this outside world that proved itself not to be trusted. He overreacted, sure.

I seriously don't know who is better to be pointed out as the villain: He or all the people around him that rejected him and bullied him. That was me too, indeed. Perhaps we all made him the way he is right now. I think the environment someone is growing up very much shapes a person.

This is another example of the fact that often when we look at the bad guys, the psychopaths we should not only point our fingers to the person committing the crimes. We the 'normal' civilians are perhaps just as guilty for these crimes to happen, because we didn't give those people the respect and the love everyone deserve!

Well a fresh week tomorrow. I'm really planning to get doing something for a change this week. I feel confident that it will going to work this time, finally. I still have to do some work for my studies, this is not a lot of work, but it just has to be done. Than there is this job I wanted to search, of which I did write some day ago. I want to try to get something at an advertising agency. I like graphic design and commercial thinking. It really is something else, but I have some feeling for graphic design I guess and I'm quite familiar with web design/development. I guess my general education is high enough and I'm smart enough to be of some value to an agency I think. Well I'll guess I just see where it ends up.

I just like to see something else, get a broader view of my possibilities and find out what I really like. Maybe after working in advertising for a while I while run away screaming, but that's just something to find out.

So I'm going to collect a small portfolio this week and start applying! At least that's the plan. I really have no idea what to expect, so it would be a nice experience.

In the mean time a made this sketch of a very underrated car IMO which many people dislike, but I love it! The Jaguar XJ-S. The older models are best (in terms of looks anyway, I guess newer models will drive better).

In this post I will try to explain how I think the world works, actually more accurate how human behaviour works in relationship with social interaction and the economy. This is not scientific in any way and are just my beliefs. So, I welcome you to doubt it and fight any suggestions I make.
I've split this post in a few parts, because it would get really to long if I didn't. This is part one.

In a society as existing today, it is very complex to understand all reasons of human activities. Sometimes it looks very illogic when we see poverty on earth, people starving of hunger, without an apparent good reason. The reason for this complexity is because details are clouding our understanding. To understand anything of human behaviour in present times, we fist need to understand the very basic human behaviour. What drives people on this planet?

To answer this question I would like to go back the “undeveloped” humans from prehistoric ages. At that time humans were nothing more and nothing less than other animals (one could claim this is still true today). What drives an animal in this world? Well this is more easy to answer.

An animal wants to survive in this world and it wants to reproduce with a high potential partner (healthy and strong). This are the only two real basic targets for an animal I believe, although you might even suggest surviving derives from reproducing, after all you need to be alive to reproduce. You might question what the point is of this, well there is no point in it, but that's another discussion.

These one or two targets create certain basic needs. Not meeting these needs will certainly cause failure of succeeding in the target(s). The animal needs oxygen, heat (no sun, no heat), water, food and a breeding partner. These are absolute necessary means for any animal, and it explains a lot of its behaviour.

Besides these basic needs, there are also a lot of things it wants because it makes chances of fulfilling the targets higher. An important one is safety, in a save environment chances of survival are bigger. Something else is status position among others of the species, a higher status will result in a bigger chance of a strong and healthy breeding partner.

Now there are also things animals will do because it makes them happy. Like eating some delicious fruit from high in a tree instead of an easier to access fallen of the tree piece. Why is the animal willing to do this effort? Because it makes him feel happy, but what is feeling happy? Well there is some theory I've got about this. The happy feeling is a chemical process in body/brain which the brain thinks is good and that's why it wants to do effort for it. It's the same reason why sugar dissolves in water, it's just the way particles interact by the laws of nature.

If you read between the lines you'll notice I have stated that there is not such thing as free will and free choice. There will be lot of people that will not accept this statement, and I'm not satisfied about it neither. But there is a very indefinite term I've used, “the laws of nature”. What are these “laws”, who made them, who controls them and what if we break the rules? Or can't we, and why not? This is not something I can not possibly explain, nor can anyone else I think. But it might be here where we can 'explain' our nature of our feeling like own choice and an individual “soul”.

Anyway to make it not to vague, lets continue the reasons why some things makes an animal feel happy while others does make it unhappy. Is it an random? Yes and no. I would say it's the cause of evolution. The chemistry in the brains did appeared at random, but animals that became happy from things that improved their chances of survival and reproduction, did survive while others died. Like the example of the fruit. The one in the tree is more healthy then the one on the floor which might be mouldy. That's why we like things that are rarely found in nature, but are healthy for us, like sugar and salt. Fat, because we need it for energy. We like playing, because we learn the limits of our capabilities and learn new movements which we could benefit from when we have to access difficult to reach food or to escape/fight enemies.

So animals with the right feelings survived, animals with the wrong feelings died. Quite simple. This is the same with feelings like love, fear, pain, exhaustion, etc. Yes, love too. Maybe odd, because love makes you do things worsening your own situation in favour of others. This might sound odd, because how does it improve your chances of survival and reproduction?

As a group you're stronger as one, this is often true, and this is why love improves your chances. Together in a group you can defend yourselves better against enemies. You can help those weak from injury or a disease. As you help others when you are strong, they will help you when you need it. If you help others often, it will increase sympathy for you, and others will be more willing to help you when you need it.


The more someone else influence your success in obtaining your targets, the more love you will feel for him/her. Children are your targets, so you love them almost infinite, your life is less valuable as theirs. Your partner helps producing your children and helps defend them just as infinitely as you would, and thereby he/she is very important (this is not with all species). But also your partner defends you from the same reason as you defend your partner. The further the relationships are the less importance this relation has for your well being or that of your children and thus the mutual love will be less.

If we even go further away from your relations, so far you won't even speak of relation any more, there will no love be left. You might even consider some of these individuals your enemies, because they make the chance of survival or reproducing smaller for you. This is why prehistoric and modern tribes or nations will fight each other. They want all the food for themselves (nowadays it's not so much for food, still it's the same idea).

So love is just a strategy of some species. There are animals that know no or limited love. Cannibalism is know with many species, and for example a black widow (spider) will eat the male after mating, apparently she doesn't see any use for him any more and the male just changed from necessary breeding partner to simple food. Or maybe even a thread for her breed because he might mate other females...?

We people have very large and complicated herds. Because it is just that; first we made tribes, then villages, growing to whole nations, and now some are even thinking of one global world. This is the cause of the technical developments, the world become smaller and smaller. We are growingly specialising, this means growing efficiency, but also people get depended from more and more people. This means all do help us with succeeding in our basic targets, still everybody might also be considered a bit of an enemy. Although it might look as everybody is playing his/her role of this world but no one is really doing it for others. Everyone is selfish in that way. We only help others because we think we will profit from it ourselves. It's not that we are really thinking this, but it's our nature. We are selfish by nature, although we might think we really doing good things for others.

All this is not a dramatic thing. Do not think other people don't care about you, because it's not true. Love does exists, I just said what it is (in my point of view anyway) and why it does exists. It's a brilliant strategy and it brought us very much as a species. It also explains that doing something good for others will only give you good things in return.

But indeed the story also has a darker side, love is not endless. If it was the point of it would be lost. Remember when I explained where love came from? Together fighting the enemies. When we love everybody, there are no enemies right? Why would you need love? But because we only want best for ourselves, everyone would be an enemy again. Because they decrease your chances by eating your potential food and mating your potential partner.
So in this society you increase chances for those close to you as they do for you. But just as well as by helping those close to you you will decrease chances for others as they do for your herd. We don't want everybody to be equal, we want the best for ourselves!

Still doubting? Have you ever heard a parent say: “I know my kid is very bright and I could give him high education at a nice school which will improve its chances for the future, I'm sure then he/she can have a nice job and merry someone nice. But that would not be a good thing for those other kids that also would like a spot in this good school and a nice job, etc. So that's why I will just give my kid some average schooling. And no presents for its birthday of course, all the spare money goes to kids in Africa who need it more.”
Yeah right!

So here I'm going to bore you with my none understandable, philosophic bull shit which I just had to write down for myself to get it some order in it. You are very welcome to share your thought with me about this.

The very elementary needs for human beings are: oxygen, heat (somewhere around 15 degrees celsius as an average, provided by the sun), water, food. For modern humans one other thing is needed: shelter (cloths and a house as protection against weather).
To provide in the one most important natural purpose for humans, they also need someone to reproduce themselves with, to prevent extinction of the species/own blood.

So what is the propose of people. Fist of all reproduce, together with the best possible partner, to get strong descendant(s). After reproducing you'll have to protect your descendant(s).
Everything else is all going back to this purpose. You'll try to stay alive to be able to reproduce and protect your descendant(s). You'll try to get status in a group to improve you're odds in finding the best partner.
In the time you have nothing to do in line of this purpose, you can recreate (play, take a nap, etc.).

So what is the use of all this? There is none as I can see. We will provide carbon-dioxide for the trees to survive, which have exactly the same purpose in life. Perhaps its the same purpose as an electron has as it circles around a neutron all day. We never ask ourselves what the use is of that, do we?

To go to sleep with a satisfied mind, you can choose two things to do.
You can think of a higher power, a next world, thinking this life is all about a path to the hereafter, like a test you'll have to make to proceed. But you'll fool yourself! This next world if it's there, would have the same dilemma, what would be the purpose of living in that world? Maybe you can do the things you like all day, but what's the point of that? You'll still be in some kind of cycle leading to nothing.

The second thing you could do is to accept that we are to stupid to understand, perhaps understanding is imaginary, and we only have the capability to predict certain things instead of understanding it. Anyway we are just like animals, doing our thing instinctively. We are no more then an electron circling a neutron time after time. We should do our thing without wondering for what reason. Many people manage to do so (although they don't realise it), there are only few that do wonder, they have a hard time doing something (about anything not in the elementary needs) when they don't know why. They sadly seems to be trapped.

If there is no use, what does result in a happy life? To start with, to be happy you should have succeed to provide yourself with the basic needs, if you can't succeed in this, you're dying, so there are real things to worry about here. You'll only have one target and that would be surviving.
People get happy in reaching their own targets, this would be fulfilling their purposes, reproducing as a very important one, but it can also be owning some material matter, or having fun playing with friends, or see new amazing things in the world, etc.
As a conclusion you can say a family in Africa which has little to spend but can provide themselves with their basic needs might be far more happy then some guy in a western city with a good job and loads of money. The family in Africa might have a lot of fun and time to spend with each other, they reproduced successfully and fulfilled their purpose in life, while the rich guy only has material possessions. Who's the poor guy now?

From our environment we sometimes might get the wrong idea about what real value is, what the things are that makes you happy. And for some reason people have a natural habit of trying to force their thoughts to others they care about, because they think these thoughts are the best way to look at things. With the best intentions people are brainwashing each other. Forcing them to have the same religion, the same way of life, that's how society works, you can call it raising your kids, you can call it education, but often a large part of it is propaganda.