Final Farewells: Im Not Moving On, I'm Moving Forward.
Sunday, 10. May 2009, 01:17:47
i guess there's really not that much to say.
i guess there's really not that much to say.
those of you that stuck with me know it all by now, and those of you that didnt have probably figured your assumptions out. since opera software isnt compatible with verizon, i wont be back on here. my tagged and deviant wont be checked often, either. im available on IM 24/7 (literally), or email or text. (juwana_mann081@yahoo.com)
let me just say, i LOVE you treehouse friends! you know who you are. and i am HELLA excited to start these new networks (finally!) and it is gonna be one hell of a trip this summer! also, my new address will be posted on my yahoo when it comes around.
i doubt that many on myopera will notice this post. i've fallen out of favor with most of you. the people who really matter already know all this. but you all claim to know me by now, and since i "burn bridges like i saw on TV", here goes.
i am really thankful for the last month. there were so many dead ends. now its over, i dont regret a second. i love who i am now. i dont have to hate blindly (unless its bush, cmon ppl!). im to the point i can almost forgive. almost. i will never forget. but i am grateful for the people who took me in and WOULDNT let me go, who showed me more by saying nothing and reaching out. their actions spoke louder than anything anyone else has ever did. thank you.
to everyone else, i know where i am welcome. and i know where i am not. i realize that for a lot of the people i used to hold so dear, i am nobody. i get it. i also see all the friendships i had that started...and ended...with me. so now i say this. i am not going to make anyone a priority in my life unless i am a priority in theirs. i dont want to have friendships where i do all the work. i am sick and tired of people leeching off me for whatever it is they are lacking in life. i am tired of being used. there are some friends of mine that will never know i'm talking about them. why? because they only hear what they want to hear. and i am tired of talking. i dont want to put effort into friendships with people who either dont like me or are too busy for me. i dont want to keep trying to please them. i love some of those people. we've been through a lot. but this is the day that i shut them out. i dont talk to anyone who doesnt talk to me first anymore. and because of that i have had to cut a lot of people out of my life. but i'm better for it. and i can lose these people easily now...i dont ever have to sacrafice one more thing for them. they use everything around them up fast and easily, and only buy everything cheap. "BUT WHAT COMES EASY GOES JUST AS FAST, AND THEY'RE SO CHEAP, THAT NONE OF IT WILL LAST".
i dont have relationships with these people. i have relations. and i'm cutting them out.
so again, thank you to everyone who has helped me become who i am today. thank you to all the friends that have stuck by me through better or worse. and i especially want to thank 3 people (they know who they are) for giving me the strength to recognize i have strength, and for seeing me as i am and loving me, regardless of all my faults. i am truly happy now because of these people, and i will never forget their help!!!
thanks to cheyenne who got me through the hospital, and helped me go sober before i ended up dying. thanks to sig for always letting me see the right way to go. thanks to kaylee for all the support. thanks to D.A.13 for all the advice and favorites :3 thanks to rob for letting me vent and always believing in me. thank you all in the "blog" for the constant feedback and love
thank you stef for letting me come back. thank you nahomy for all the random hyper moments. thank you tara for the comments and letting me know everything i miss out on 
thank you all my "in-town" friends for the forgiveness and laughter.
thank you all the people who broke me down, used me, went through me like i was nothing, made me disposable, made me suffer, supported my addictions, made an idiot of me, talked shit, took action against me, or anyone in this pathetic town that has never been honest with me. thanks. now i know what too look for when greeted by killers, rapists, fakers, scammers, and scum
i guess there's really not that much to say.those of you that stuck with me know it all by now, and those of you that didnt have probably figured your assumptions out. since opera software isnt compatible with verizon, i wont be back on here. my tagged and deviant wont be checked often, either. im available on IM 24/7 (literally), or email or text. (juwana_mann081@yahoo.com)
let me just say, i LOVE you treehouse friends! you know who you are. and i am HELLA excited to start these new networks (finally!) and it is gonna be one hell of a trip this summer! also, my new address will be posted on my yahoo when it comes around.
i doubt that many on myopera will notice this post. i've fallen out of favor with most of you. the people who really matter already know all this. but you all claim to know me by now, and since i "burn bridges like i saw on TV", here goes.
i am really thankful for the last month. there were so many dead ends. now its over, i dont regret a second. i love who i am now. i dont have to hate blindly (unless its bush, cmon ppl!). im to the point i can almost forgive. almost. i will never forget. but i am grateful for the people who took me in and WOULDNT let me go, who showed me more by saying nothing and reaching out. their actions spoke louder than anything anyone else has ever did. thank you.
to everyone else, i know where i am welcome. and i know where i am not. i realize that for a lot of the people i used to hold so dear, i am nobody. i get it. i also see all the friendships i had that started...and ended...with me. so now i say this. i am not going to make anyone a priority in my life unless i am a priority in theirs. i dont want to have friendships where i do all the work. i am sick and tired of people leeching off me for whatever it is they are lacking in life. i am tired of being used. there are some friends of mine that will never know i'm talking about them. why? because they only hear what they want to hear. and i am tired of talking. i dont want to put effort into friendships with people who either dont like me or are too busy for me. i dont want to keep trying to please them. i love some of those people. we've been through a lot. but this is the day that i shut them out. i dont talk to anyone who doesnt talk to me first anymore. and because of that i have had to cut a lot of people out of my life. but i'm better for it. and i can lose these people easily now...i dont ever have to sacrafice one more thing for them. they use everything around them up fast and easily, and only buy everything cheap. "BUT WHAT COMES EASY GOES JUST AS FAST, AND THEY'RE SO CHEAP, THAT NONE OF IT WILL LAST".
i dont have relationships with these people. i have relations. and i'm cutting them out.
so again, thank you to everyone who has helped me become who i am today. thank you to all the friends that have stuck by me through better or worse. and i especially want to thank 3 people (they know who they are) for giving me the strength to recognize i have strength, and for seeing me as i am and loving me, regardless of all my faults. i am truly happy now because of these people, and i will never forget their help!!!
thanks to cheyenne who got me through the hospital, and helped me go sober before i ended up dying. thanks to sig for always letting me see the right way to go. thanks to kaylee for all the support. thanks to D.A.13 for all the advice and favorites :3 thanks to rob for letting me vent and always believing in me. thank you all in the "blog" for the constant feedback and love
thank you stef for letting me come back. thank you nahomy for all the random hyper moments. thank you tara for the comments and letting me know everything i miss out on thank you all my "in-town" friends for the forgiveness and laughter. thank you all the people who broke me down, used me, went through me like i was nothing, made me disposable, made me suffer, supported my addictions, made an idiot of me, talked shit, took action against me, or anyone in this pathetic town that has never been honest with me. thanks. now i know what too look for when greeted by killers, rapists, fakers, scammers, and scum
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