Monday, 30. July 2007, 19:39:36
joke
A Doctor in Newfoundland wanted to get off work to go golfing, so he approached his assistant. "Garge, I am going golfing tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all of our patients." "Yes, sir!" answers Garge.
The doctor goes golfing and returns the following day and asks: "So, Garge, How was your day?"
Garge told him that he took care of three patients. "The first one had a headache so I gave him TYLENOL."
"Bravo mate, and the second one?" asks the doctor.
"The second one had stomach burning and I gave him MAALOX, sir" says Garge.
"Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?" asks the doctor.
"Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and a woman enters. Like a flame, she undresses herself, taking off everything including her bra and her panties and lies down on the table, displaying herself. She said 'Help me, I haven't seen a man for five years!''
"And what did you do Garge?" asks the doctor.
"I put drops in her eyes."
Monday, 16. July 2007, 16:50:27
joke
To get to the other tide.
Wednesday, 11. July 2007, 20:06:31
joke
Don't look at anything in a physics lab.
Don't taste anything in a chemistry lab.
Don't smell anything in a biology lab.
Don't touch anything in a medical lab.
And, most importantly:
Don't listen to anything in a philosophy department.
Wednesday, 27. June 2007, 23:18:19
joke
Two fish swam into a concrete wall. One turned to the other and said, "Dam!"
Friday, 22. June 2007, 17:25:48
joke
Two cannibals were eating a clown.
One said to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"
Saturday, 16. June 2007, 14:45:05
joke
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.
Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice.
After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"
"I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill."
The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try.
The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills.
When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.
Sunday, 10. June 2007, 13:52:22
joke
A defence lawyer said to his client: "I've got good news and bad news. The bad news is your blood test came back and the DNA is an exact match with the sample found on the victim's shirt."
"Damn it," replied the client. "What's the good news?"
"Your cholesterol is down to 140."
Saturday, 9. June 2007, 15:41:11
joke
The hot dog vendor was surprised when a robed Buddhist monk asked for one with everything on it.
"I thought you guys were vegetarians?" he commented.
"Just do it," snapped the monk, handing a $20 bill.
The vendor handed over the hot dog.
"Where's my change?" demanded the monk.
The vendor gave a serene smile and replied, "Change comes only from within."
Thursday, 7. June 2007, 14:00:21
internet censorship
here is an link to a website where you can test any url to see if it is blocked or not in China.
http://www.greatfirewallofchina.orgI'm not sure how accurate it is... I tested my webstie, that is absolutelly apolitic and doesn't have any disturbing content, but it gave me that I'm blocked in China. Maybe that's the reason, why I never get any visitors from China... I don't know why they would block it...
Saturday, 2. June 2007, 16:57:36
joke
The teacher of the school geography class was lecturing on map reading.
After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude?"
After a confused silence, little Johnny volunteered, "I guess you'd be eating alone!"
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