When do you know you are ready?

I have been trying to cheer M up these days. Her 4-year relationship seems to have lost its stickiness. Her bf is in Cambridge whilst she's in London. They don’t talk on the phone often. He doesn’t even come visit her regularly. They think 4 years is more than long enough not to act like a couple in the first stage of love. Wrong. I know deep inside she's feeling depressed. The happiness to have a long-term bf has become a burden of how to maintain it. It can't just come from one side. No communication. No face-to-face conversation. Not to mention, no affection. What's to keep it rolling? Telepathy? Mutual secretive understanding? Wrong again. No quarrels doesn’t mean no fights. They are fighting against long distance, against silence, against assumption that they have been bonded and had to try no more. Or maybe I am wrong. Maybe 4 years does mean something. Maybe that IS long enough for people not having to say sweet words, to give each other tight hugs on coming back from work or kiss good night. Maybe appreciation of the other has been taken for granted. But I wonder, is it "to be" or "not to be" in a relationship?

My silly Y today also complained about the "external" interference in her relationship. Honey, I don't think that's negative. I look at it as "practical" and "necessary". Wake up babe, you ARE in a relationship and everything is so real. A relationship does not only involve two people. It's more like two people in the whole world, where there are other people who do care for you. Needless to say my little piggy princess, mark 2010 in your diary, and we'll discuss more. Before then, only 15 more days to go… ^ ^