My OperaBy the Light of the Moon
Friday, December 23, 2011 5:47:24 AM
She was exhausted and stressed and apparently disappointed. She was out of control and struggling to collect herself. My eight year old girl, Ferne was beside herself simply because it was already 8:55 p.m. and she still had so much to finish: study for her French spelling test, read, and write in her journal. Yes, of course she has a journal; she's my daughter after all! With a note of anxiety, she blamed me for allowing the time to slip by, and said that she hated herself for not being prepared for the spelling test. Nothing I could do would calm her down. I tried everything. I tried extending her bed time by an extra20 minutes, I tried getting her to concentrate on the time we still had to study for her test, and, seeing that she was way too tired to study anyway, I tried advising that she rest and wake up fresh the next morning and study then. No matter what I said, her hysteria grew. She even started to thrash around in her bed, not able to contain herself. She lost it.
Then her brother, Louis stepped inside the room. He had just finished taking his shower and stood before us covered with a towel. Observing the dynamics of the scenario, he decided to include his own spice in the mix. Just as he turned around to exit the room, he purposely let his towel drop, mooning us both. Ferne began to laugh and the tension disappeared quickly. She let go of beating herself up (and everybody around her) and traded it in for a little levity.
What an idea! Trading in the pressure and self-defeating thoughts for a little levity is certainly a simple, but effective concept.
She ended up studying a little, writing in her journal, and going to sleep. The following morning she woke up and studied for her spelling test to at last master every word listed.
Here’s how it works. Not much will get accomplished when you are hopeless and feel bad about yourself. But at times it happens, and we just feel bad about ourselves and dissatisfied about our results, or lack thereof. The more often we stay focused on the goals we have not reached, the bigger the hole becomes and the more difficult it is to fill it.
So here’s the key. Use a bit of levity to lift yourself up. Shift your focus. Do something else, and when you are feeling low, focus on feeling better. Have an ice cream. Go for a run. Listen to a wonderful song. Call a friend. Reconfigure your mind to recall the last time you felt aligned and really great. When you are moving toward a better frame of mind, your odds of attaining your desired goals significantly improve.
Kim Ades, MBA, President of Frame of Mind Coaching and JournalEngine™ Software, is one of North America’s foremost experts on performance through thought management. By using her unique process of coaching through journaling, she works with clients to unveil and switch their thought patterns to ignite significant change and life transformation. Share your story at www.frameofmindcoaching.com or assess your frame of mind at www.assessyourframeofmind.com.
Then her brother, Louis stepped inside the room. He had just finished taking his shower and stood before us covered with a towel. Observing the dynamics of the scenario, he decided to include his own spice in the mix. Just as he turned around to exit the room, he purposely let his towel drop, mooning us both. Ferne began to laugh and the tension disappeared quickly. She let go of beating herself up (and everybody around her) and traded it in for a little levity.
What an idea! Trading in the pressure and self-defeating thoughts for a little levity is certainly a simple, but effective concept.
She ended up studying a little, writing in her journal, and going to sleep. The following morning she woke up and studied for her spelling test to at last master every word listed.
Here’s how it works. Not much will get accomplished when you are hopeless and feel bad about yourself. But at times it happens, and we just feel bad about ourselves and dissatisfied about our results, or lack thereof. The more often we stay focused on the goals we have not reached, the bigger the hole becomes and the more difficult it is to fill it.
So here’s the key. Use a bit of levity to lift yourself up. Shift your focus. Do something else, and when you are feeling low, focus on feeling better. Have an ice cream. Go for a run. Listen to a wonderful song. Call a friend. Reconfigure your mind to recall the last time you felt aligned and really great. When you are moving toward a better frame of mind, your odds of attaining your desired goals significantly improve.
Kim Ades, MBA, President of Frame of Mind Coaching and JournalEngine™ Software, is one of North America’s foremost experts on performance through thought management. By using her unique process of coaching through journaling, she works with clients to unveil and switch their thought patterns to ignite significant change and life transformation. Share your story at www.frameofmindcoaching.com or assess your frame of mind at www.assessyourframeofmind.com.
