Now that i have your attention..
Please allow me to converse with you.
I just wanted to tell you how i really feel about you,
i mean,afterall,you're someone i consider a "friend"
A person i confide in during low times and a person i surrender all my life stories to.
But do you want to really know why i respect you?
I'll tell you,but you must be strong,just like you've told me to be
The reason i respect you and hold you in a high regard is because....
You,my Friend are.......Uncaring!!!
I'm uncaring how?is what you may ask yourself,but that's why someone looking in from the abuse of your ways,
as myself shall fill you in.
i know your inferior mind won't be able in any amount of years begin to understand your own stupidity
so i shall help you fill in the blanks.
hold on to your heart.
You're uncaring because you only see me as a fucking thrash bin to throw all your oh so heavy worries/problems in
but whenever i want to get close to you and confide in you,you turn away in disgust of not wanting to deal with the likes of me
In the silent nights when only can your weeping can be heard,i step forward and extend my hand out and i give you my soul to heal in,i endure your tears,your shouts of agony,and all your painful love experiences
I soak in all in for the sake of healing another's soul with the risk of hurting my own
I don't mind.afterall,what are friends for?
why a question mark?because it's a good question to consider
don't you think
what are friends for?
i sure in the hell don't need any if they all fall in the same class with you ne
i'm best left alone.i never needed anyone and i'm not going to start relying on such false vessels known as humans
You know,you said to me the other day ago
"haha!isn't it funny how you used to freak whenever we said i love you kyou?you remember don't ya?truth is,you hated love so much,so we never really loved you,we just said that to get you in a good mood.hahaha!funny ne?"
Funny how?if you mean leading me on for years thinking i was loved,accepted,and respected by all,then in a sense,we can call that cruel humor.but am i really to laugh along with you when i'm the victim here?
Do you know how many fucking years i've struggled to accept that one day i will have to let people get close to?
but when i finally let you close,you crush me and beat me down again
Did you even consider i am infact,a human being as yourself?
I know i may not come on as serious or bothered by any amount of insults,but i am just like a cup,you can feel me up to a certain extent but if you go too far,i will overflow and that's exactly what has happened.
You bastards made me go through life thinking you all were my "friends",family,etc.
I felt loved after so many years going down a dark path and to hear that we never loved you....Only makes me sink lower and now,i question if i was ever loved or accepted by anyone?
I'm broken because you are someone that i love to be involved with and someone i trust without end.
But you go and laugh at my flaws and make a foolish joke of it!?
ARE YOU KIDDDING ME!!!
It's like now,All those kisses were a spit in my face and the "i love you" was all simply a big "fuck you kyou"
it's all clear to me
I don't trust anyone anymore,i don't ever want to hear "i love you",Friendship is meaningless,Trust is just a fake word to get others to falsely believe in your methods.
As of now,i don't give a damn about your problems,your life,your sadness,your despair,and most of all i don't love you anymore.
You may stand before me,in your mind thinking that you are speaking logical,but to my ears,those "logical words" are voiceless.
It's written on your face,you are nothing more than a leech who only uses me to your own benefit
Hell!wouldn't be surprised if all my friends were the same way.
I'm not respected....i'm a big joke.
"Oh kyou!i need you to be crazy again.i need you to be happy,i need you to cheer me up and in return,i'll give my gratitude by not listening to your bitching."
Is it a deal kyou?
that's my answer to you.
how does that sound?
Sounds great to me.
As of now
Don't count on me ever again,because i don't need you or anyone else
One person i can turn to is myself
one person who'll never leave me physically or mentally.
With that said
i hope you have a never ending life of happiness and wealth.
god knows i will never have it thanks to you.
I'm not your friend
I'm not your family
I'm not your lover
I'm not your world
I'm not your brother
I'm not your Son
I'm not your husband
I'm not your everything
But rest assure
i can tell you one thing i am to you
I'm Nothing to you
I hope you burn in your sleep
Have a pleasant day...Friend