so the kids take down all of the paper snowflakes used to taunt the gods of snow and guarantee free days off from school and tossed them all away those peeks of driveway and tufts of grass that somehow poked through clouding their memory of where they live
april first foot and a half of snow predicted they both whined at breakfast how they wished they could have gone to school and they werent fooling
he said so we couldnt take the music and the stoopid chick that kept insulting our wives who werent even there and kept buying us shots of jacks to apologize and finally said f it lets go home
well driving down main at twelve and something doing thirty at best i get yanked over for failure now im serious failure to dim my highbeams
no shit get out of the truck do the pen test and fail stumble on some broken tar on the shoulder and fail and gotta do a breath test a few towns over blew a point one eight
i was a half a mile from my driveway
i got three days in jail one week in rehab and at least six months loosing my license all cos that annoying bitch
uh no it was cos you drank too much and then drove home
a fistifght almost breaks out when j starts chatting about some kid whose moms a mess and has been drugging him up with prescriptives since she adopted him from a junkiemom all to get her estranged husband to stop poinking some twenty year old see the cross i have to bear she says help me help me she says and the kid gets worse and worse and mom hides the documents from the docs and monkeys with the meds and the boy and hes a good boy gets weirder and sicker and more twisted up with each passing day he tried to kill himself twice last week alone and the mom doesnt get shit except a bunch of people telling her how brave she is and how much of a cross it is to bear and
odd silence
t is glaring
t knows the woman actually he was related to her at one point in a non blood but close enough to take offense kinda way
in that frozen oh shit moment no sound lots of eyeballs and clenched fists
shes fukkin borderline look it up t snorts and walks gets in his truck and leaves
c ever the opportunist yeah your borderline almost got your ass kicked ever get tired of chewing on your shoes
j fukk i got so much shoe polish on my teeth it might as well be toothpaste gets in his car and follows t
c almost under his breath whispers the measure of a man
referring to the statement that the measure of man is not how he screws up but how he handles his screw ups
c wants to take bets on whether j gets popped or not
so chatting up this lawyer at a local district court he mentioned the headache and the ulcers i asked why he chose the job and he said im an aggressive fuk i get to beat up on lawyers and prosecuting attorneys and judges shit if i didnt have this job id probably be in trouble
so howd court go mr point one eight say mr or shall i say mrs point one four
three months no time standard drunk class took the hit with the points on the license but not too bad
jaws dropped jj was incensed as mrs point one four he took hit on time six months loss three days jail and one week res rehab plus a hit on points six to be exact and standard drunk class plus forty count them forty hours of counseling
jj boiled over when he said not too bad
i had to fukkin make up shit to get thru that counseling crap fourty f in hours im a half an hour kinda guy how the f much did you spend on a lawyer
he said as my brother and i know you dont cheap on vets electricians surgeons and lawyers
My Opera
march what march
sorry_e_elumbar35 # Saturday, April 2, 2011 12:54:15 AM
so the kids take down all of the paper snowflakes
used to taunt the gods of snow
and guarantee free days off from school
and tossed them all away
those peeks of driveway
and tufts of grass
that somehow
poked through
clouding their memory
of where they live
april first
foot and a half of snow predicted
they both whined at breakfast
how they wished
they could have gone to school
and they werent fooling
gonna be a long month
sorry
fools day eleven
sorry_e_elumbar35 # Saturday, April 2, 2011 12:59:41 AM
he said
so we couldnt take the music and the
stoopid chick that kept
insulting our wives
who werent even there
and kept buying us shots
of jacks to apologize
and finally said f it lets go home
well
driving down main
at twelve and something
doing thirty at best
i get yanked over
for failure
now im serious
failure to dim my highbeams
no shit
get out of the truck
do the pen test and fail
stumble on some broken tar
on the shoulder and fail
and gotta do a breath test
a few towns over
blew a point one eight
i was a half a mile from my driveway
i got three days in jail
one week in rehab and
at least six months loosing my license
all cos
that annoying bitch
uh
no
it was cos you drank too much
and then drove home
yeah well theres that
says he
sorry
fouroneeleven
sorry_e_elumbar35 # Saturday, April 2, 2011 1:04:13 AM
tough day at the office he was asked
been one of those days
says he
up to my neck in lawyers
some of them i need
none of them i can kill
his three buddies agreed
that he had the quintessential
shitty day
sorry
fouroneoneone
sorry_e_elumbar35 # Monday, April 18, 2011 9:40:45 AM
worlds collide
over a few beers
a fistifght almost breaks out
when j starts chatting about some kid
whose moms a mess
and has been drugging him up
with prescriptives
since she adopted him
from a junkiemom
all to get her estranged husband
to stop poinking some twenty year old
see the cross i have to bear she says
help me help me she says
and the kid gets worse and worse
and mom hides the documents from the docs
and monkeys with the meds
and the boy
and hes a good boy
gets weirder and sicker and more twisted up
with each passing day
he tried to kill himself twice last week alone
and the mom doesnt get shit
except a bunch of people
telling her how brave she is
and how much of a cross it is to bear
and
odd silence
t is glaring
t knows the woman
actually
he was related to her at one point
in a non blood but close enough to take offense kinda way
in that frozen
oh shit
moment
no sound
lots of eyeballs
and clenched fists
shes fukkin borderline
look it up
t snorts and walks
gets in his truck
and leaves
c
ever the opportunist
yeah
your borderline almost got your ass kicked
ever get tired of chewing on your shoes
j
fukk
i got so much shoe polish on my teeth
it might as well be toothpaste
gets in his car and follows t
c
almost under his breath whispers
the measure of a man
referring to the statement that
the measure of man is not
how he screws up
but how he handles his screw ups
c wants to take bets on whether j gets popped or not
there are no takers
sorry
fourseventeeneleven
sorry_e_elumbar35 # Monday, April 18, 2011 8:02:36 PM
so
chatting up this lawyer
at a local district court
he mentioned the headache
and the ulcers
i asked why he chose the job
and he said
im an aggressive fuk
i get to beat up on lawyers
and prosecuting attorneys
and judges
shit
if i didnt have this job
id probably be in trouble
a lot
nothing like
fitting the man to the job
sorry
fourseventeeneleven
sorry_e_elumbar35 # Sunday, May 1, 2011 1:12:38 AM
so howd court go
mr point one eight
say mr
or shall i say mrs
point one four
three months
no time
standard drunk class
took the hit with the points on the license
but not too bad
jaws dropped
jj was incensed
as mrs point one four
he took hit on time
six months loss
three days jail
and one week res rehab
plus a hit on points
six to be exact
and standard drunk class
plus forty
count them forty
hours of counseling
jj boiled over
when he said
not too bad
i had to fukkin make up shit
to get thru that counseling crap
fourty f in hours
im a half an hour kinda guy
how the f much did you spend on a lawyer
he said
as my brother and i know
you dont cheap on vets
electricians
surgeons and
lawyers
fourtwentytwoeleven