Wednesday, 28. May 2008, 22:59:56
death, life, decisions, money
In life there are always decisions to be made. There are easy decisions; if you are going out and it's raining, you decide to dress appropiately. If you are hungry, you get something to eat. Simple. There of course more challenging decisions; you dislike your job, so a decision to have a "sick day" is a little more tricky, especially when you're not sick. A decision to nick a pen from work is unlikely to give you much pause for thought, but would you steal a computer? Most probably would not, the incentive of having a free computer weighed up against the possible consequences of prosecution, humiliation and maybe incarceration are enough to deter most. There are those who are prepared to take the risk, to make the poor decision,for the immediate gratification and thrill of getting away with something for nothing.
Admittedly, the human condition is to take the easiest option. if given the option of digging ditches for eight hours a day or watching television for eight hours for the same amount of pay, only the most energetic - or televisual-phobic - of us would opt for the ditches! In these days of consumerism and, until recently, ready credit, many have made the decision to live beyond their means. This is not a conscious decision. Few make purchases on their credit cards thinking "I can't afford this." Generally the human attitude is "it will not happen to me." So with that somewhat myopic approach, many find themselves in debt; a lot of debt.
Mistakes are normal, everybody makes them. There just seems something about financial mistakes, debt creating mistakes, that causes people to make poor decisions. Poor decisions such as borrowing money to service debt, avoiding their creditors, under selling cherished items; killing.
How much money do you have to owe to resort to murder? What price a life? A million pounds perhaps? Ten million? Would you make the decision to kill a stranger for ten million? Would you do it for half a million pounds? You don't know the person, how bad can it be? Plus you end up half a million - less your debt - better off. Bad decision? Would you kill your spouse for that much? Someone you profess to love and cherish? Does money cause that sort of, what can only be termed, madness?
Nisha Patel-Nasri was killed for less than four hundred thousand pounds. By all accounts, she was a lovely person, a credit to the community, a part-time police officer. Her husband, Fadi, had arranged to have her killed so as he could cash in her insurance policy. He had been seeing another woman, leading a double life and managed to acrue vast debts. He is not the first man, or person, to lead a double life and he surely will not be the last, and though his dual life was distasteful, it becomes a mere aside when the story of how he arranged for his wife of a barely three years to be murdered - he supplied a kitchen knife and the keys of their home to his would-be accomplices - just so as he could sell the house and collect the insurance. News items make no reference to how their relationship was; good ,bad or indifferent. There is a some mention of her having thoughts of divorcing him, so perhaps all was not rosy in their relationship. By all accounts, anything of any worth was also in her name, even to the point of underwriting his limo business. Undoubtedly they had money worries. Fadi looked for the easiest solution out of his debt burden. I imagine that if he was thinking that his wife was going to divorce him and leave him destitute, that he felt he had no choice, he had to do something. Unfortunately he made a very poor and callous choice.
In all. there were four men involved - the husband, two men who were to carry out the deed and a getaway driver. For the price of a house and a life insurance policy, four men made very poor decisions. Thankfully they will have plenty of to review those decisions in jail.
Monday, 19. May 2008, 22:19:23
back, opera, blogging, nostalgia
I am not sure if I'm back or if this is just a temporary sojourn into my past life blogging - I have just spent half an hour reading my old blogs - but it felt like a moment to write again. From all the evidence it seems I enjoy it! Blogging was always something I did to fill the insomniac voids of nights when sleep would not come - I'm writing this at ten past eleven at night - tonight seems to be one of those nights! As I sit here listen to funk, with my eyes itching to sleep, I am feeling a little nostalgic for my many nights of pouring random thoughts out to cyberspace. I still have things to say I suppose. Whether I have the energy to translate them to the page remains to be seen. Opera used to be my first port of call when I switched on my computer, but when the browser started getting glitches and refused to work on my laptop, Opera was lost. Since my laptop died, replaced by a snazzy desktop, I can use Opera again - even if I am still using Firefox - I may have to switch back to Opera. I think the writing was a good discipline for me. Besides, I enjoy it! Maybe, just maybe, I'm back. But is it for one night only?
Sunday, 8. July 2007, 23:06:38
Jennifer Hudson, Dreamgirls, Oscar
Sunday, 27. May 2007, 04:49:46
life, single, cooking
An hour ago I was sleeping. But after coughing for the last half hour, I am now awake and - obviously - writing. Having missed work yesterday - and training - feeling not at all like myself (sore throat, achy limbs, my back!) the sore throat has decided to subside and become a relentless - nope, I tell a lie, it is only relentless when I lie down, as I sit writing this, I am positively cough free! Seeing as I’m awake and my mind is a whir - feeling a bit peckish too…- I thought I would continue on my mild rant vein with ramblings of my single-dom - admittedly not something I was acutely aware of, having been sort of bouncing around ex-girlfriends of late, but that really is another blog.
Having crashed through the past decade, my thirties, the time when I was expecting to sort my life out, find my “House on the Prairie” - this was the idyll I aspired to growing up - meet the “one”, be…well just be . That didn’t quite go to plan. Not that there was a plan - Pa never had a plan in House on the Prairie! - it was all just meant to happen. Maybe I watch to many films, but aren’t people meant to meet and click and run towards a rainbow or some such? Or at least agree to pay bills on time and have a modicum of similar interest. So I thought , a little over a decade ago - my how time flies - I know what I want. I love Latin looking girls, clubbing, music, non-smoker, non-drinker (well, not necessarily teetotal, but the getting hammered on a weekend was never me.) Apparently, though I never knew this at the time, if you put the thought out “there” , you will attract it. I did. Met a beautiful girl, Mediterranean looks, loved clubbing, non-drinker, non-smoker, plus; great cook, got on with all my friends, - believe me, this was unusual, given some of my previous choices! - relentlessly positive outlook. Perfect. Lovely woman, loved her, as a person. Didn’t fancy her. Aargh! Suffice to say, her best efforts could not save that relationship. So….hmmm…what to do? I remained single for awhile, changed my career and found myself - I was a little bit lost, as only we with to many options can be. So I’m working in the gym - well, I was sitting at the gym reception desk and got thunder bolted by a brunette coming up the stairs. Who was that? I wondered. Instant attraction. She seemed a little aloof and in the coming weeks as she came to the gym, nothing in her manner contradicted this image. But still I fancied the pants off her. We got to talking - sorry about the western slang - and clicked immediately. The relationship moved at warp speed, to the point that we were living together inside a month! Then the fun began. She did not go clubbing - admittedly I was slowing down anyway - but our musical taste were quite different also. She was given to depressive episodes and rages, she also liked a drink or two and on occasion ten! She was a fabulous cook though - I can and do cook, before I get angry mail from the equality massive! - she was a mass of insecurities, not where the relationship was concerned, just in regards to herself. THIS woman I fancied, loved a great deal. We were so similar in character, if not traits, it was freaky. But the clashes became to much and to tiring. We work much better as friends.
So where am I? Looking for a spark with a non-smoking, sensibly drinking - still liking the brunette/Latin look, so that would not hurt - to not have a total aversion to exercise wouldn’t hurt either.
Should be able to cook….answers on a postcard, or forward your c.v’s. I’m quite shallow, so a photo would be appreciated. Preferably of you, not your hot friend - unless you’re sending them my way! Thank-Q.
Sunday, 20. May 2007, 22:53:49
As I write this I am trying to find a position which does not ache to much! I managed to play football twice today- once eleven a side and later in the evening a seven a side affair- admittedly, I did not have to play both games, but I do enjoy a kickaround. But honestly, coming off the back of quite an intense week's training, my legs not having recovered from a race I was somehow coerced into on wednesday, I am happy to say I have got through the day relatively unscathed. Though it does hurt to breathe! I'm gonna hurt tomorrow...
Tuesday, 15. May 2007, 10:19:39
By some weird fluke I find myself in nervous anticipation of two events. Tomorrow I have been coerced into a race over five - five! - sprint distances and on sunday i'll be playing eleven a side football (god help me or my team!) I am really getting to old for this sort of thing...
Monday, 14. May 2007, 21:37:02
I'm writing this on my phone, as I am not able to get online because my modem is not working properly. I've been inside my own head alot lately, trying to...i'm not quite sure why, but there is something. My single-dom continues, though admittedly, I am not short on offers for company, which is nice for the ego if nothing else. I have been irritated by my unnecessary dark moods, which seen to have been prompted by nothing more than petulance, caused by my life not running as swimmingly as I would like. There are other real reasons, but I prefer to see them differently and - hopefully - as temporary. My head is in a better place now. Just have to try and keep it there. Vague I know.
Thursday, 26. April 2007, 22:19:41
me, life, future
This is a little odd. talking to myself in this way. But sometimes one must try unusual methods or routes to achieve one's objective. That objective - an appreciation of life, contentment and happiness - being very important, I am prepared to utilise any means necessary to get the message across. To myself. So...to get to it...do you know how blessed you are? You are loved by family, friends and even ex-girlfriends! You have a job you enjoy and look forward to doing, still seeking knowledge within your field, so obviously retain a passion for. You're in physically great shape, look forward to exercising - training! - even though it's your job! The future looks great - going to Olympics in China! There'll be the trip to your spiritual home, La Santa, before that and who knows where else? The power is within you to do anything. Anything you put your mind to. So what's holding you back? Is it not about time you "shone" as children do? Is it not time to be alive, not just survive? In life, you have to make mistakes, but you don't have to have regrets. Time to leap.
Tuesday, 24. April 2007, 15:31:43
I'm lost on the train to..? Caught in the morning push hour, i'm trying to get to Wandworth town hall. I may have got on the wrong train. It's bloody hot as well, even if it is depressingly overcast. I listening to music - rolling stones, stevie wonder - i'll have to change train at some point...I can do this, how hard can it be? The people watching is fun. For the majority it is alone time; reading, waking up, dozing, bobbing their head to music, texting, conversations on mobiles, doing make-up, other people watchers. I'm on my way to a cultural diversity course. I'm hoping it will be interesting. At least I didn't have to get up to early!
Friday, 20. April 2007, 19:38:38
It was always a bugbear of mine, but I had held some forlorn hope that by making it illegal, people might stop doing it! A little naive perhaps, given that, unless the world has gone totally insane, there are quite a few crimes which have been illegal since before my lifetime, yet they so no sign of abating, so what made me think people would stop using their mobile's whilst driving?
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