Friday, May 8, 2009 1:18:13 AM
My husband had surgery on his shoulder in early September. The procedure is called 'Bankart Repair'. Initially we were told (erroneously) that the recovery time would be 6 weeks. When we went to see the doctor for the follow-up visit, we learned that the recovery time is actually more like 6 months. It was a very painful process. My husband could not lay flat, so he essentially had to sleep sitting up. He also needed to take very strong pain medications. Even with these he was still in rather severe pain.
At the end of September we had to move. We got some financial help for this, but almost no physical help, so my husband was forced to be packing up boxes and helping to carry some of them out to the moving containers. His friend who helped us so much ended up moving most of our stuff out of the house into the containers. We ended up needing 3 containers. We really need to pare down!
We moved into the most reasonably-priced place within a half-way reasonable distance from home base (our son's school, our church, my parents' house, etc.). Our first night sleeping here a mouse scurried across the floor in front of us when we were on our way into the bedroom. I really hate having to deal with mice, but the landlord hired an exterminator to get them under control. He's going to have to have some structural stuff done to the house, though because they are still getting in. 8 months later I am still looking at boxes and wondering how I'll ever get them unpacked and put away.
My husband applied for medical benefits, and because of a delay in receiving paperwork, it was the end of October before we received any benefit money. We also found out that the benefit amount was only going to be just under $1000.00 per month - less than 40% of our monthly expenses. It was going to be hard. We applied for and got financial assistance to cover our son's monthly tuition, so at least that was covered. We also found a hospital where he could do outpatient physiotherapy so it was covered by our medical insurance. At the end of December, my husband's medical benefits were cut off. He started looking for work right away & applied for regular unemployment benefits. Unfortunately he was not sufficiently recovered to take just any sort of work. He also applied for several Class B contracts with the military. He was accepted for one.
On February 6th 2009, my husband left for his posting. The term of the contract is 15 months. He will have vacation time, and the military will pay for transportation to & from home once during the term of the contract. Any other visits we will have to pay for ourselves. He has his own room & has arranged for high-speed internet service (the ISP gives military folks a discount), so we can e-mail, chat, and talk via our soft phones nearly every day.
Since he's been away we have been recovering financially (albeit slowly). He was promoted to Corporal on April 16th, which is supposed to come with a raise, so hopefully we can actually get caught up on things.
Right now he's away from the base on a training exercise, so we haven't spoken to him since 30 April, and won't have any contact again until 10 May (Mother's Day). I'll have to do the Mother's Day thing with my Mom on Saturday so my son & I can be home Sunday evening to devote it to talking with my husband.
We both really miss him. I am exhausted much of the time & struggling with depression & anxiety. I also have to try to help my son to cope with missing his Papa, and deal with the behavioural issues he has at home and at school. I'm sure my son is quite bewildered seeing me struggle with not knowing which end is up or what to do first. I hate having to be tough with him, but if I don't he won't learn to be a good boy. Still, he knows I love him.
We are so thankful to all of the friends, family, and other benefactors that helped us out so much during our recent period of severe financial difficulty. We prayed for help, and God prompted these people to help us. Thank you Lord!!!!
Sweetie, if you happen to read this: I LOVE YOU TONS!!!!