Keith's Journal

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Posts tagged with "humour"

The people who walked in darkness...

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From the Naked Pastor:

Peak Rock

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Andrew Bolt reproduces this interesting comparison of Quality Rock Music (as measured by Rolling Stoens Top 500 hits of all time) against the output of US oil.

The message is obvious- to avoid peak oil we need more high quality rock music.

It's for you!

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From ASBO Jesus:

Ghosts Cause Climate Change?

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Amusing poll results at Watts Up With That:

We’ve seen that man-made global warming has taken some hits in the opinion polls lately, and that its 10 minutes of fame may be over, but sharp eyed blogger Dave R. at Care2 spotted this zinger. I’ve posted the graphs and tables from the polls with highlights below.

Dave R writes:

In the United States, more people believe that houses can be haunted by the dead than believe that the living can cause climate change. Is this simply a scary Halloween tale or our frightening future?

The latest Pew poll on global warming shows a large drop in the percentage of Americans who say there is solid evidence that global temperatures are rising, from 71% down to only 57% in the last 18 months. And global warming due to human activity? The overall numbers have declined from 47% to 36%. To put this in perspective, a Gallup poll found that 37% of Americans believe that houses can be haunted.

Here’s the Pew poll graphics:

Pew_poll_AGW_table

Pew Poll Data Table - note highlight

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Praise GOOG?

almost

almostNaked Pastor
Blogged with the Flock Browser

Do you think this might be a scam?

I just got this email- for some reason it just seems a bit dodgy.

GREETINGS FROM THE THRONE OF GRACE,
Beloved Friend,
Let me first of all inform you,i got your e-mail address from a mail director and decided to mail you on a permission to go ahead.I am Pastor Brian Aoustin from HILL SONG CHURCH, with my wife Darlene Zschech. Please we would like you to do us a favour,this is about a PROJECT that was given to us by the church of GOD,and which worth the sum of $250 (two hundred and fifty thousand united state dollars)the PROJECT was given to me and my wife,it is all about the HILLSONG INTERNATIONAL COLLEGE that will be build in a country called Nigeria in Africa for the progress of the work of the Lord, Beloved the Lord we serve is a great GOD,he knows our heart desires and he will do a great thing for you if and only you will help me and my wife out,it's an urgent PROJECT,please we beg you in the name of the Lord,this money is not as big as what the Lord will do for you and we promised to pay you back as soon as we come home in Australia, Please Beloved this mail is secret we donnot want any other person to know about it exept you,it is between you,i and GOD and you will see what the Lord will do in your life. God bless you as you help us out.But remember we need this money urgently even if you donnot have it complet you can lend from some one close to you,we will be praying for you and the Lord will give you what ever you want in life.
God Bless you,
we await your urgent reply
Pastor Brian Aoustin
&Darlene Zschech.



Just a few things that I thought might be possibly suspect:

1. The senders email was from a yahoo.com address not a hillsong.com
2. Brian Houston not Aoustin
3. Darlene is not his wife
4. The spelling mistakes run against his teaching of excellence
5. I thought that despite his New Zealand heritage, his grasp of English might have been a little better.


But apart from those tiny details I'm sure it's genuine. I'll send him the US$250,000 tomorrow.... not!

Dark Humour From "Cyanide And Happiness"



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Tech support

From xkcd.com

Newton & Leibniz

From xkcd.com

Extreme Pastoring 101

Here's one for the pastors and other sheep lovers among us..

A Cold to Warm Snap on the Way!

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Looks like next Wednesday might set a few records in Narrabri, if this is right. Firstly we have not in recorded history had snow showers and also I think snow is unlikely to fall in temperatures over 6 degrees.



The same forecast at the weatherzone web-site shows Wednesday forecast as being "Showers"

A Week of Batching!

We aren't quite this bad yet, but I'm glad Margaret's on her way home.

My Pranking Son

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Last night just as I was about to go to bed, I logged the Eee on to facebook where Phil had posted this message:

Philip Andrew Bates and Michelle Tan are now engaged!



That was a surprise as despite the occasional hint that there might be friends, there was no sign of anything serious. We called his mobile and just got voice mail.

This morning we finally got onto him and discovered that, of course, it's a prank.

The story is that last night a bunch of friends went out ice-skating to farewell Michelle who is moving to Perth. As Phil and Michelle were trying to help each other stay upright one of their friends ducked into the sound booth and announced over the P.A. "Everyone, give a big applause to Phil and Michelle who have just got engaged!"

At Macca's later, they decided that it would be a great prank to make it "official" on facebook.

The official consensus at home was that it looked more like a prank than for real-- but then you can't really be certain.

Thanks Phil for giving us all a laugh. You've learned well from Lisa.

Cherry ripe: Drunk badger passes out in street

From the ABC:
Cherry ripe: Drunk badger passes out in street

A badger in Germany got so drunk on over-ripe cherries it staggered into the middle of a road and refused to budge, police said

.A motorist called police near the central town of Goslar to report a dead badger on a road - only for officers to turn up and discover the animal alive and well, but drunk.

Police discovered the nocturnal beast had eaten cherries from a nearby tree which had turned to alcohol and given the badger diarrhoea

.Having failed to scare the animal away, officers eventually chased it from the road with a broom.

- Reuters
Cherry ripe: Drunk badger passes out in street - ABC News (Australian Broadcasting Corporation)
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Vicar of Dibley Elected Head of Methodist Church

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It's just wonderful that a ground-breaking sitcom has been so influential! Yay to Dawn French! "Shall I minute that, sir?"

From "Ekklesia"

Methodist Church elects 'Vicar of Dibley' campaigner as President

A campaigner who has supported actions against the arms trade, rights for destitute asylum seekers and marched on Downing Street in a 'Vicar of Dibley' style action to highlight issues in the developing world has been elected as the new Methodist President.

The Revd Alison Tomlin has been elected President Designate of the Methodist Conference for 2010-2011, and Deacon Eunice Attwood has been elected Vice President Designate.

The election results were announced at the annual Methodist Conference in Wolverhampton.

Alison Tomlin is currently Chair of the Northampton Methodist District, having previously chaired the Oxford and Leicester District. In September she will become co-Superintendent of the Thames Valley Methodist Circuit with her husband Dave. She has served the Church as a minister for 25 years, having originally been ordained in Wolverhampton in 1984.

Alison was part of a group of female clergy and ministers, led by Dawn French, which marched from Trafalgar Square as 'real-life Vicars of Dibley' to Downing Street as part of the year-long the Make Poverty History campaign, pressing for structural change to aid, debt relief and trade policies.[/quote]

Full article

Here's a clip for those who aren't familiar with the Good Vicar!




And this is the main bit of the first episode:




My soul thirsts

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From "The naked pastpr"

The Spirit of Churchill lives on!

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Those Somali pirates had better not touch any more British cruise ships! Maybe Britain should send more OAPs to Afghanistan. The Taliban would surrender in days.

From Tim Blair

POWER OF BERYL


Feisty pensioners from Britain used deck chairs to fight off Somali pirates who tried to hijack their cruise ship on the Indian Ocean, passengers and the vessel’s owners say. They sprang into action when pirates tried to board the MSC Melody off the Seychelles on April 25. According to MSC Cruises spokeswoman Sarah Longbottom: “Mr and Mrs Rowlands were on the deck. Beryl Rowlands threw deck chairs at them.” (Via Saint)

POWER OF BERYL | Daily Telegraph Tim Blair Blog

Outback Golf

You just have to love the sense of humour of our outback mates!

Morning Devotions

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An incisive cartoon from the naked pastor: