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Noah Counte

Hanging around in a one horse town

Randomania

Wednesday, 13. May 2009, 02:52:46

,

Regular readers may remember that I once posted a great deal. The rest of you probably don't know that I ever posted anything, it's been so long since i actually did something here. In any case, here's a bit of the random for you.


  • It's Yogi Berra's 84th birthday today. He's the greatest catcher ever to play baseball, though he's best known for being the master of the malaprop. His fractured quotes make people laugh, and usually, upon further contemplation, he often turns out to be spot on. He had only an 8th grade education, but he

    • was named American League MVP three times. Only three other players share that honor
    • won ten (yes, 10!) World Series as a player
    • led teams in both the American League and National League to World Series Championchips
    • was voted to the All-Star team 15 times
    • had more home runs than strikeouts in five seasons
    • led catchers in innumerable fielding statistics


    It's the quotes that endears Berra to the hearts of non-baseball fans:

    • "Baseball is ninety percent mental. The other half is physical."
    • Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.
    • I just want to thank everyone who made this day necessary.
    • I never said most of the things I said.
    • I wish I had an answer to that because I'm tired of answering that question.
    • On why he no longer went to a popular St. Louis restaurant: "Nobody goes there no more; it's too crowded!"
    • "It ain't over till it's over." - After Berra's 1973 Mets trailed the Chicago Cubs by 9½ games in the National League East; the Mets rallied to win the division title on the next-to-last day of the season.
    • "When you come to a fork in the road, take it."
    • If people don't want to come out to the ball park, nobody's gonna stop 'em.
    • I'm not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did.
    • On being the guest of honor at an awards banquet: "I'd like to thank all those who made this night necessary."
    • If the world was perfect, it wouldn't be.
    • If you ask me anything I don't know, I'm not going to answer.
    • "It's like déjà vu all over again". Berra explained that this quote originated when he witnessed Mickey Mantle and Roger Maris repeatedly hit back to back home runs in the Yankees' seasons in the early 1960s.
    • Even Napoleon had his Watergate.
    • He hits from both sides of the plate. He's amphibious.
    • "You can observe a lot by just watching."
    • I knew the record would stand until it was broken.
    • A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore.
    • "Always go to other people's funerals; otherwise they won't come to yours."
    • If you don't know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.
    • In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is.
    • It ain't the heat, it's the humility.
    • It gets late early out there.
    • It was impossible to get a conversation going, everybody was talking too much.
    • The future ain't what it used to be.
    • The only color I don't have is navy brown.
    • We have deep depth.
    • We made too many wrong mistakes.
    • You wouldn't have won if we'd beaten you.
    • You can observe a lot by just watching.

    Happy Birthday, Yogi.

  • Want your own little chat room? tinychat lets you create a chatroom for free, invite the people you want to chat with, and it doesn't require any downloads. Cool, huh?

  • Why on earth is the lovely (and rich) Padma Lakshmi doing a Burger King ad?

  • Listen: I know that there aren't many career options available, if you don't have a decent education, but don't go thinking that you can be a crook. Seriously. Burglars need to smarten up! Although, I must say, not having a license probably won't add too much time to your sentence. Of course, not having the proper badge might create problems when you pull over a deputy.

  • FLASH: the reason they give prison guards keys is so they can lock the prisoners in.

  • If you've ever wanted to divvy up your monitor, so that you could run applications side by side (or something), but sizing everything by hand each time was a pain in your kiester, try MaxTo. it lets you compartmentalize your monitor, so that when you maximize a program, it fills the part of the screen you want it to fit in. I'm probably doing a poor job of explaining, but it's really a cool little download for Windows. You can also use DesktopCoral. Nifty!

  • The squeaky wheel gets the grease.

  • If you're a crappy parent, you shouldn't be permitted to sue for your child's death.

  • And you thought tere was honor among theives. Ah, sweet irony - or a theif with a wicked sense of humor.

  • Never bring a squeegee to a knife fight. Unless you've got Chuck Norris skills! Speaking of Chuck Norris, he's so bad, he doesn't even have to actually be around in order to deter crime.

  • I bet you didn't know there was a national pole dancing competition. I think it's about exercise, but no one should be surprised that the finalists include exotic dancers (even though the competition asserts that its competitors "are not strippers
    • ."

That's all I have. Thanks for remembering that I still exist. :smile:

Hey Goombah!Peace Chain

Comments

ellinidata 13. May 2009, 03:02

:smile: Great to see you back Matthew,
Happy Bday to Yogi Berra :hat:

it is a great Randomania that will fill my lunch time tomorrow in a very pleasant way ,thanks for sharing :smile:

I_ArtMan 13. May 2009, 03:08

fascinating as always , matthew. my favorite...

""When you come to a fork in the road, take it." i use that one every day. :happy:

noah counte 13. May 2009, 03:15

Wow. You two didn't waste any time! Thanks for stopping by.

I love "when you come to a fork in the road, take it." I have my own context, of course, but too many people are paralyzed by choice.

dragon_harrower 13. May 2009, 15:16

I'm definitely going to give MaxTo and DesktopCoral a whirl. I need something like that at work. :yes:

noah counte 13. May 2009, 15:19

Excellent. Let me know what you think :smile:

dragon_harrower 13. May 2009, 15:24

I will. I think I'll just try MaxTo. It sounds more like what I'm looking for. Thanks for posting them. :yes:

ellinidata 13. May 2009, 17:39

" You two didn't waste any time! "

no time wasted :lol: waiting two months in the neighborhood for a new post was generously rewarded ! :yes:

noah counte 13. May 2009, 19:44

Heh. You are far too kind.

Nerak 14. May 2009, 16:54

Wow! Awesome linkage you've got going on here! :yes:

The Chuck Norris thing kills me! :lol: Amazing.

Oh, and yeah - they're not strippers at all. Nope. Uh uh. Nein. :rolleyes:

noah counte 14. May 2009, 16:59

Hahah. So many other uses for a pole while dancing, after all.

Chuck Norris apparently is bad-ass. I mean, he won't make you crap your pants (like, say, a ninja), but he'll mess you up pretty good.

Nerak 14. May 2009, 17:02

A measly poster of him will apparently mess you up! :lol:

noah counte 14. May 2009, 17:43

hahaha. You don't mess with a poster of Chuck Norris, now!

Shaunak 15. May 2009, 05:05

Chuck Norris PWNS!

themugs 15. May 2009, 20:28

Pole Dancing - my new favourite sport!

noah counte 16. May 2009, 02:10

Hahaha. Everyone needs a hero rolemodel roleplayingmodel.

dragon_harrower 16. May 2009, 02:20

More like poleplayingmodel. :wink:

ellinidata 16. May 2009, 02:37

more like a poleshowoffmodel p: Ok I am jelous, I admit it ! :D

noah counte 16. May 2009, 13:23

hahaha. I'm not going to touch "polesplayingmodel" with a ten foot... Well, you know.

dragon_harrower 17. May 2009, 04:12

:lol: I thought you'd appreciate that one. :wink:

I'm just as jealous, Angeliki. :lol:

noah counte 17. May 2009, 13:13

Install a pole and practice, ladies. I saw that some porn star is selling an exercise program that includes a pole which, unlike other such poles, goes all the way to the ceiling. I'm just trying to picture working a pole that isn't firmly attached, top and bottom. Weird.

ellinidata 17. May 2009, 13:29

I am learning no tricks from a porno star,and that's final! :lol:

noah counte 18. May 2009, 00:14

Hahaha. I am sure you're watching "Sesame Street."

dragon_harrower 18. May 2009, 01:57

:lol: That'd give the old people in my apartment complex something to talk about. :lol:

noah counte 18. May 2009, 04:41

I know some old people who don't need anything to talk about in order to talk. I know some young people like that, too. :lol:

ellinidata 18. May 2009, 11:46

"Big Bird" was always a favorite

noah counte 18. May 2009, 11:56

I wonder if he was gettin' jiggy with Ernie and Bert?

ellinidata 18. May 2009, 12:07

:cry:
zinc can make you jiggy!
I did hear some rumors
if they did ,
I will blame it to the zinc in "sesame"
http://www.whfoods.com/genpage.php?tname=foodspice&dbid=84

dragon_harrower 18. May 2009, 15:54

I know precisely what you mean, Matt. :lol:

noah counte 18. May 2009, 18:47

Explain it to me! :lol:

Nothin' wrong wit gettin' jiggy wit it.

dragon_harrower 18. May 2009, 18:59

Why would I do that? :whistle:

noah counte 18. May 2009, 19:50

If you know what I mean, it's only fair that I find out, too!

dragon_harrower 18. May 2009, 21:09

I'll just keep you guessing. It'll give the neighbors something to talk about. P:

noah counte 19. May 2009, 01:19

The neighbors won't shut up, already!

dragon_harrower 19. May 2009, 14:15

:lol:

lekrot 21. May 2009, 21:21

Great post, thanks Matt and welcome back :up:

noah counte 21. May 2009, 23:58

Thanks, Torkel. I'm still slow, but I'm percolating ideas. :lol:

Nerak 22. May 2009, 03:32

About pole dancing - I've seriously been considering taking a pole dancing class. Not so that I can earn money from it, but it's apparently an amazingly good work out.

But then I'd want to put a pole in the bedroom and that'd sorta look not right if the landlord ever did a walk-through. :left:

lekrot 22. May 2009, 07:58

:lol: Very good, good luck with your percolating.
Karen, why not put the pole in the garden? :whistle:

Nerak 22. May 2009, 10:10

The top of it has to be secured to something. :left: Correct? :right:

Even if you can get one where it doesn't need a ceiling...my Ultra Christian neighbors would probably attempt an exorcism on me. :eyes:

noah counte 22. May 2009, 11:55

I always thought the top had to be secured - but it was a really big deal that the stripper's product actually went all the way to the ceiling (suggesting that other products do not). It was as if she was the first one to think of it.

Ultra Christians are among the biggest consumers of lap dances, I hear...

Nerak 22. May 2009, 20:39

I guess that's where the "Ultra" part comes into play. p:

noah counte 23. May 2009, 00:26

hahaha. A point to remember when dealing with them. Speaking of which, my sister and her kids are coming for a visit next week :smile:

Nerak 24. May 2009, 06:11

"Speaking of which"? :lol: Bust out the pole! w00t!!!

noah counte 24. May 2009, 15:01

Hahaha. Oh man. It's bad enough when I hit them with my rhythm stick - busting out the pole might be a sign of Armageddon.

Nerak 24. May 2009, 18:36

:lol: Hahaha!!!

I guess the pole will remain our secret...'til they leave! :hat:

noah counte 24. May 2009, 22:46

Mum's the word. :lol:

Now that I think of it, Mum probably doesn't want to know about the pole, either...

edwardpiercy 24. May 2009, 23:48

Ah, I love those Yogisms. I used the "You should always come to peoples
funerals" one once in a story.


Naked burglar: I hate it when that happens.

Consumer alert: I used to try to get in through our dog door. But then
I went off to college and no longer had a dog door.

Party robbery: Well yeah! -- that's a must do for sure.

Chuck Norris: He's a tough guy. But what really frightens me off is his
acting.


(Welcome back -- missed your posts.)

noah counte 25. May 2009, 00:30

Heya Edward :smile: I hope I haven't shot my wad, as they say.

I'm glad to hear you wear trousers when you go burgling.

Nerak 26. May 2009, 23:39

Yeah- something tells me Mum would keel over if she found out about the pole. Let's protect Mum and keep that sucker in the attic! :yes:

noah counte 27. May 2009, 01:38

:whistle:

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