Noah Counte

I haven't done this for a while, so I've gone a little crazy. Read some, and come back later for more!

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More news than excellent advice today, but I've got some thoughts on free text editors in the works for Thursday, I think. Even given that I cut this into two posts, today's is pretty long. There are a couple of laughs here, a couple of things to be upset about, a couple of things to help with the appearance of cleanliness, And some brief thoughts about acting locally to make global differences.

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I started to make a randomania post, full of things I find interesting on a variety of subjects. Standard fare, really: some news, some DIY tips, some computer tips... Hopefully helpful stuff. I still have a lot of things to share, but this post sort of settled out into the following list of things you can put on your thumbdrive to increase productivity, or simply to take things you need with you.

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Oh man. I've gone nuts! This is really two, maybe three posts. You'll get tired before you get to the bottom, I am sure. I blather like an idiot! Still, there is funny stuff here, useful stuff here, and stuff that made me laugh or smile, but probably isn't funny to anyone else. It's up to you to wade through it all. Or not. Run away while you can!

• Patients like me gives you a place to find out about procedures and care, and to share your experience. Dealing with the medical community doesn't need to be scary, as long as you have some information to draw on. This site lets you interact with people who have been in your situation, and lets you share your experiences with others.


• I know you do-it-yourselfers will love this paper lampshade. The directions aren't exactly lengthy, but they should work if you practice once or twice. Let me know how it works!


• Google Code University can teach you to be a programmer. Well, if you study a little...


• Nudists are always fun. And today, they're news! Yea!
  • Nudists in Canada are suing paypal. Paypal stopped accepting payments for their naturist magazine on the grounds that it was pornography. I'm guessing some poeple at Paypal don't know what pornography is. Call it a hunch.
  • Canadian nudist twofer! Some naked Canucks now have the right to swim in the buff at their local wave pool. Meanwhile, in the U.S. we're get bent out of shape about breast feeding. GOSH!
• If you have Office 2003, and people send you Word docs from Office 2007, you can download the converter, or you can open Word 2007 files in IE. You can't edit them, but you can read them.


• If free software turns you on, you should check Give Away of the Day. Daily. Every day, someone is giving away software that you normally have to pay for - and these folks make it available to you. It's a crap shoot - you never know what you're goona get (chances are it won't be a box of chocolates), but it's sometimes something you could use or that you want.


• Rootbeer - gateway to substance abuse:
  • Utah State students know how to live. They get together for drinking games like beer pong. ROOT beer pong. Kids today! Too wild for their own darned good. I wonder if anyone has thought about teaching them to play Quarters?
  • With all other crime under control, Green Bay police bust a root-beer kegger. There will be commendations for this!
• Improve your health with a tattoo. A vaccination tattoo. it's more effective than getting a shot into the muscle!


• If you chicks want to be happy, you should hot hook up with one of us plain guys. Really! We're antidepressants! Don't worry though - it's not all sunshine when you marry an ugly guy. Six of one, a half-dozen of the other...


• Elliot Spitzer may have created problems for himself, but the New Governor has some skeletons in his closet, too: New York Vice. Not to be outdone, New Jersey has a judge who is an idiot. I mean that in the nicest way possible!


• California middle school kids are becoming black market entrepreneurs. Seems school bans on candy sales, and the subsequent removal of candy machines, has created a vacuum. Into the breach, lads! Young businessmen and women are selling Twinkies between classes - and in some cases during class - to fill the preprocessed, refined sugar void left by the moratorium on candy. Watch your knee caps!


• A five year old boy saved his grandmother from choking, which makes him a hero. In related news, you can choke on jello.


• Ever wonder what you might see if you strapped a camera to an elephant, and sent him into the jungle? Satisfy your curiosity by viewing images from Trunk Cam. Cool stuff.


• The Barbie Bandits have been sentenced. The man they twisted around their little fingers, and forced to do their bidding, received the most time behind bars. Hehe.

  I know a life of crime has led me to this sorry fate, and yet, I blame society. Society made me what I am. -- Duke (RepoMan, 1984)



• I don't want to suggest women are lazy, but men still earn more. I'm kidding! About the laziness, I mean. The wage disparity still exists, and it still sucks.


• You're a flight attendent who likes to Youtube... And now you have your very own Delta safety video. Man, being a hot redhead is its own reward, eh?


• Fort Meyer's FL kids got something extra in the pile of freebies tossed from parade floats this Easter. Parents are grumpy, and organizers promise to do a better job vetting the participants next year.


• Perfection gets in the way. Learn how to figure out when good enough is good enough.


• Here is a list of ways that you can conserve water at home.


• If you want to share files with someone, but your emails don't support large files, you can use Filedropper to share files for free (up to five MB). Just upload, and send the URL to people you want to have access.


• If you use rechargeable batteries, this story may interest you. Not every battery (or charger) is created equal. To quote Pogo, Forewarned is four armed (and four armed is half an octopus!).


• Clear the crap left by your installation of Vista SP1. If you installed the upgrade, your harddrive is cluttered with the detritus of unused bits and bytes. This tool takes care of the mess.


• A cluttered inbox interferes with productivity. Here's some good advice on how to clear your inbox. Note to self: spend a couple of afternoons following this good advice!


• If you want a more manly physique, maybe these tips on how to build muscle fast. You can buff up if you are a female, too - even if you don't want a manly physique.

Here's a bunch of news you can't use, plus some tips that might come in helpful. And a couple of things I thought too funny to pass by.

• The University of New South Wales' School of Fibre Science & Technology has a handy chart to assist you in deciding how best to attack that ugly stain on your favorite shirt/skirt/underwear.
  
  
• Eliot Spitzer, ex-New York Attorney General, and current New York Governor has been champion of the people. He's sued big business on our behalf, and won. We love Eliot! It appears he's also been screwing high priced call girls. Maybe. Keeping an eye on this one.
  
  
• Some of you drink more coffee than I thought humanly possible. Learn to defend your habit. And as long as it's so important to you, you might as well roast your own beans - with kitchen gadgets you can buy at a garage sale for $0.50.
  
  
• Chuck Norris is the only WMD in Iraq. Took us six years to figure that out. On a side note, it's Chuck Norris's birthday today! Happy 68^th, Chuck!
  
  
• What's the funniest thing you can do with Noah Webster's stoney finger? I mention this only because it involves a Noah. And condoms.
  
  
• Spend too much time reading online? Here are some tips to teach yourself to speed read on the Web.
  
  
• If you've rescued a greyhound, and you take her to a football game, you have to expect the crowdnoise to revive memories of her glorious past, don't you?
  
  
• Virginia wants to lead the way: french-kissing kids no longer acceptable.
  
  
• Those of you with new record players may appreciate that vinyl's making a comeback (albums, not fetishwear)!
  
  
• If you use online wish lists, you can keep an eye on the prices of the objects of your desire with Savvy Circle. Not that I do. Or would. I'm just saying...
  
  
• Cool pic of earth at night. A word to the wise: the link takes you to an image that lets you click on it. If you do, you get a random picture. My random picture was of a very well-built young woman in a very small swim suit. If you are at work, you might consider self-restraint.
  
  
• Weren't Legos fun? Now adults have a toy, too: Bloxes.
  
  
• Blurt things out that you wish you could take back? Carry a sandwich.
  
  
• You're staging an abortion protest: do you go to a clinic that provides them? No, you go to Horton Hears a Who. Man, are you an idiot.
  
  
• Ladies, when marrying, you have two options: don't hyphenate your name, or pick someone a name that doesn't make you sound like an idiot, pervert or ho. Or you could go with OPtion 3. Click the arrow - there are thirteen of those gems.
  
  
• Public Service Announcement: If you hired a hooker and she took your money and left you *ahem* unsatisfied, you can't sue for your money back, except in parts of Nevada.