qlue's blog

Aadil,
you are single because you respect yourself enough
not to get politically correct
by following everybody elses' example!
the divorce statistics are higher not
by people that respect women and themselves,
but by "multiple non-committal relationships"holders
the ones that marry but they are not ready for the marriage!
I see it daily on line here
men and woman that clain to have the "love of their lives"
in their life,
they try to find happiness by chatting for multiple hours
with other commited people.
Who ever tells me that all is frendly ,
will have to notarize his/het tongue for me to believe them!
it is cheating on line and it seems OK,
the multiple relationships continue....
either on line or in real life:(
be yourself and ignore "smart@@@@@" that know everything!
You don't want your fiance' or wife on Opera
posting provocative videos, pictures or chat with other men
all day long!
Your life has to change 100% when the time comes for you to have a family and to do so,
a. you have to be ready for it,
b. you have to find the right person to become the mother of your children and focus in her family the way you are willing to do so !

I am proud of you!

You are welcome Aaadil,
there are some great people out there,
you don't set time in life,
when I left my coutry,friends,family,job for the man I married,
I knew it was the right thing to do!I never regret it ,even after becoming a widow at 29. The bar he set is so high I will nevet settle for less.Remember not all people realize that marriage is special!
the time will come for you...
trust your feeling only,
nobody elses!

I think you're right Aadil. I too have seen the phenomenon first hand and have yet to see any good come of it.

Awww qlue.. Come on to the darkside and shag every which way till your willy falls off.. Then you can take a shower .
Seriously though.. Everyone should live their lives as they think. If its his choice to shag around then so be it. Though safety is a prerequisite and religion isn't an issue..
Still you don't need to 'play the field' to find the right woman eh..

No, you're not wrong. The world is a pit of corruption and vice, and there are very few people with virtue left.
Your way of life will bring better - because you won't end up with someone who's whored themselves around - you'll find someone with the same ethics as you, hopefully. There may be few people like that, but it doesn't mean you'll never find your lady . It just means that you won't be like everyone else - flitting from partner to partner unhappily trying to find the right one.

Are you saying I'm wrong then?

*sighs* no, it's just some people need different ways. What works for one, doesn't for another, yadda yadda yadda.

Mind if I give my two cents on this? There are a million ways to live our lives and each and every one of them is wrong in some respects.

While you believe you're keeping yourself ready for the woman you'll end up with, you may well be missing out on that woman by not giving her a chance. The woman of your dreams doesn't magically drop into your lap. She starts as a regular date and you build the relationship together. It's not romantic like the movies but it is practical and a lot longer lasting than most.

And purity is another word for naivety these days. How hurt would you be if you didn't have the practiced skills to retain the woman when you do find her? Women like to say how they admire a guy like that, but the sad fact is they admire him only as a friend even if they wont admit it. When it comes down to sex, the majority of women will leave if it's no good, even if they're not willing to admit it themselves.

I agree that the world has become a sweating, rutting cesspit, but that only increases the need to at least participate. As more people adapt to this, more will have preconceived standards that someone without experience just can't regularly fulfill. And no matter how many women protest, the fact remains that these things do matter to them more than a guy with a past.

Just some food for thought on how this can affect a happy relationship in the future. You don't need to sleep around, but don't stop yourself completely in the vain hope that romance will save the day.

you are not wrong. keep your standards and don't let anyone change you.

my quote is this:

"Don't let anyone tell you that you can't do something. For if they do, it just means that they couldn't do it themselves."

don't let them bully u into changing your standards.

Save your self a galaxy of trouble, stay single.

What right do I have to comment on the issue? I may not lay eggs but I know more about omelets than the hen

Wait... So you are saying that "any female port in a storm isnt the best method for obtaining a wife"... damn I have been working the wrong angles... repetitively...

I can't comment because I always had like 4 boyfriends at a time when I was single...
Have I ever been single? Oh yeah...when I was under 14.

Sometimes you have to take a chance for gain something greater. You learned and will continue to do so. In the end (not yours your pervert) you will find the woman you are searching for.

Two more cents' worth: people who are sure they have "the answer" to what they perceive to be "your problem" are usually full of poo. First, your coworker assumes being single is a problem - I'd say that's your call, not his. Second, screwing around seems an ironic way to seek a committed relationship, even without the moral underpinnings of your religion to make it unworkable.

Merry Christmas anyway...

Go pack some womans stocking with your beef log...

Oh wait, I mean share a nice evening with a lovely woman...

How do you know who can be trusted?

Buddy, they are not talking about depositing ones heart at first.... Just a few million spermies... It goes along the same lines as banking. The more you put in the easier it is make a withdraw...

And you can't hold people to promises made while incapacitated, Ripp. By the time they're drunk enough to give in, they're too drunk to be capable of consent.

Why not, Aadil? Some of my best and longest lasting relationships have come from no presumption of commitment before sex. Kim and I have been together over six years now and we were just mucking around at the start with no expressed commitment made to each other. After we got to know each other properly we both realised that we wanted that commitment with each other and I proposed on Christmas Day (the timing was down to a lack of cash flow and not being able to get a ring and present).

Let me use your bank analogy for a second to make my view clearer. You may want a contract with that bank before giving them your money, but unless you could see what a good bank it was in the first place you wouldn't be interested. If it looked like a shoe shop you wouldn't even offer it your money. The same applies to love. Unless you're willing to get close enough to someone (and this can mean sex depending on the person) to know that they're a bank you can't say they're the right or wrong one for you, or even get offered that contract. Not counting stalking the only way to start getting close is to take the chance and go on a date.

I'm not saying film yourself having sex with a thousand virgins. Hell, where would we find that many these days? I'm saying give love a chance before you turn it away. I've seen people go into relationships with your mindset (which I'm understanding as living together and sex before marriage are the signs of untrustworthiness so you wouldn't consider someone who was up for that - correct me if I'm wrong) and the majority of them are bloody miserable because they aren't compatible and never took the time to find that out. Unless you've lived with someone for quite a while and seen them at their best and worst, you can't say "This is the one for me." and be telling the whole truth.

Basically, there's only so many people in the world. Would you really be willing to turn away someone you could be happy with for the rest of your life, just in case?

Depends on if you follow Ripp's advice. My second longest relationship came from a one night stand that just lasted quite a few years longer than was planned. It ended eventually, but at one point we talked about being together forever. If she hadn't had a miscarriage we probably would have ended up together and I may not have met Kim at all. .

I'm not saying hit a brothel and I don't even know what a shebeen (sounds vaguely transexual) is? Even if it's ultimately not for you, you have to know that there are people out there who get together these ways (one nighters and such) and it all worked out for them. There are more honestly happy people together who met through a drunken one night stand than who waited til after marriage for sex.

At the end of the day it comes down to personal choice, but you do have to sacrifice something whatever you choose to do. There are no guarantees with any way, it's all a numbers game in the end. Like I said at the beginning of my barrage of comments, there are a million different ways to live in the world and they're all wrong.

Shebeen... she bin? Sounds promising...

There you go trying to rain on my parade...

okkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk is just as good as yes...

A pub then? My idea was funnier.

I don't think anyone would meet anyone in a shebeen that wouldn't turn out cheap and slutish. Personally the place is only good for getting alcohol afterhours.
Pubs are your best bet to get to meet people. Except if you're religious and you go to meets regularly.
Go in the afternoon and shoot some pool. Most likely there'll be some girls that go to do just the same. A pub isn't just for drinking yo.. Most girls I know don't drink at all or they sip on some coolers. Don't need to be drunk to have a good time .

A relationship isn't built on sex but it doesn't hurt to have a good time but still playing it safe eh..

the only reason i got to a bar ne more is to play darts...and thats VERY RARELY considering the closest one is more than a mile away, and im NOT gonna walk there....lmao

Don't get 'obsessed' by being single, Aadil. When 'she' comes into your life you'll know it for it's different. Suddenly the 'attributes' become less important and you'll discover that "click". Until then divert your attention a bit from the tall stories men always tend to make about women. Just smile about them and shake your shoulders. Your time will come! Read the wise words from Aunt Angeliki above, hang them above your bed even and abide your time... Have a good 2009!

I have to agree with Matt.

Unless people are close friends who are truly concerned about your welfare, they should just mind their own frigging business.

ur wr0ng! mr.Aadil !!

u do need a patren for its damn necessary!! nd u said"is there only 1way to get married to realati0nshp b4 marige vd da wide vriety of w0men!" so let me tell u its nt necessary at all!

u do need a patren for its damn necessary!! nd u said"is there only 1way to get married to hv realati0nshp b4 marige vd da wide vriety of w0men!" so let me tell u its nt necessary at all!

like ur singal as ur sayin bc0z of dis reas0n!! so i thnk there wud b a w0man just like u singal bc0z of the same reas0n! nd i thnk u shud find her or wait 4her!!

So...many...exclamation...marks.

gud-malik - you seem to have misplaced your letter "o"

i got my new computer...check out the post on it, and the link to the forums post at the end of it