Directory of Lost Causes

I've been keeping Justin in the airing cupboard here, to try and dry him out a bit. I think he might have a silverfish infestation now.

Anyway, I took him out and dusted him off just as he was in the middle of his new designs for a prehistoric masquerade ball, and I asked him what he was thinking about the Dawkins situation:

"Yeah, hey, like I think I've pretty much lost interest. I haven't posted stuff because there doesn't seem to be anything new there."

"I think even Richard Dawkins has lost interest in Richard Dawkins. Or he would have, if he was even there to begin with."

"Yeah."

"I think we're boring our audience and that will never do."

"Yeah, hey, and I'm working on some really interesting designs now, too, all in different shades of gold."

"Anything to say in summary?"

"Not really. I, well, I might post a couple more things on the thread."

"Yes. I might too. Just generally try to wrap things up, leave it on a cliffhanger or something, so there's always the chance that the hero didn't die in the fall, or the villain, for that matter."

"So the hero didn't die in the villain?"

"Well, there is always that chance, yes."

"Yeah, hey, sounds cool. I just don't think it's going anywhere now."

"If there were a chance of some discussion."

"Well, it was getting really interesting a while back there."

"I'll have to take credit for that, as it was after I'd told them they could do better, wasn't it?"

"Yeah. I mean, hey, what was that all about anyway? We're just a couple of, like, flakey Taisho/Yellow Nineties hybrid fashion models and designers who just happened to arrive on the Dawkins board by accident as we were travelling back from the 23rd Century to get those sewing patterns from Arthur Machen, hey?"

"Yes. But on a lighter note, I feel a bit like, if I ever actually meet Richard Dawkins now it will actually be hypocritical of me to be pally and stuff. So, the only way to clear the air, if he comes round for muffins (which are, by default English), is to offer up front to have a fight. A duel to the death. I won't push it. I shall merely say that the offer is there, like the muffins themselves."

"Yeah. I'll be your second."

"Great."

"I think I might attack England."

"Excellent."

"No, I don't mean with like submarines and lasers and the members of the Shield Society and shit. I mean, on the thread."

"Oh yes. Of course. Well, if you do, I shall corroborate. I think attacking England is an excellent idea. It's all about England."

"These English atheists are not the same as the ones back home."

"Not any more. When I was an atheist, we had a much better class of atheist about. But, unfortunately, a few hardline materialists have emerged from the woodwork, trying to take materialism to the end zone, with all this 'collision of worlds', science-against-religion-for-the-big-showdown shit. It's so tacky."

"Yeah. Could you pass me the glue? No. I mean, like, the paste. Thanks."