Woss on the Web

Are you one of the three people to occasionally peruse this blog? Are you filled with an overwhelming sense of pity every time you scroll down the page to find yet another Merlin/Ainslie/Wreckers reference? Would you agree that my life seems altogether rather pointless when you take Punsi and Girls Aloud out of the equation? Do you ever worry about my general well being given that I hate my degree and most of my favourite things have either been cancelled or dropped by their record company? If so, you can finally help shine a light into my miserable existence!

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Good morning my loyal, or should I say, NOT SO LOYAL, readers. It has come to my attention that over the past four or five weeks, my blog’s viewing figures have slumped to their lowest level since the last time I stopped writing anything and instead resorted to posting a series of large pictures to fill up space. I am deeply sorry, and am pleased to announce that since I now have revision to do, normal blog service shall once again be resuming, starting with a brief critical assessment of my doings last month, which is only around 60% reliant on pictures.

Futurama!
After I bought a giant poster of Bender for my bedroom wall, I felt like I should actually investigate the programme from which he originates. In order to achieve this, I acquired all four seasons of Futurama about three weeks ago and have been watching them continuously ever since. This has proved fatal to my commitment to my degree, but I can just pretend to have been hypnotised by the Hypnotoad, so it’s fine.

Weather Watching!
It’s surprising just how much pleasure you can get from looking out of windows and tutting to yourself. Pigeons continue to congregate in alarmingly large numbers on top of a single lamppost and the bin hut, I’ve noticed a steady increase in the squirrel population, and oddly enough, ever since Christmas, the car park has been really quite empty. Where has everyone gone? Even if there’s nothing actually happening, there’s always the weather to distract me from whatever I’ve been working on. Rain is handy for persuading me not to go to the library, but my favourite is still snow. It snowed last month, and I was very happy.

Dragons!
On one of my visits home, I realised that I had no interesting possessions left in my bedroom whatsoever, having relocated them all to Glasgow. On this particular visit, I had deemed it unnecessary to bring my laptop. This was a mistake. Thankfully, after rifling through my bookshelf, I found the Field Guide to Dragons book that Sarah gave me for Christmas. Excitingly, this book contains a number of model dragon kits. I spent several hours constructing each and every one of them, much to the horror of my brother who has now disowned me.

Here's the Common European with Small Troll.


Watch out Percy Pig! Back away and avoid eye contact!


This is the stupidest looking dragon ever.


The frost dragon means business.


This is a dwarf dragon, or as we dragon experts call it, draco parvulus.


Essays and stuff!

I’ve had an upsetting number of assignments and essays to do recently. I probably shouldn’t complain since I only had two classes a week and then the rest of my time free to work on them, but where’s the fun in that. Instead, I left them all to the last minute and stayed up into the early hours of the morning fretting about word counts. My tried and tested method that I used in January where I bribed myself with chocolate for every hundred words didn’t work either since I’d eaten all the decent Celebrations.

People Getting Really Old! (Apart from me)

Almost everyone I know is creeping closer to the grave, and in order to try and forget about this, they’ve been going out places to dance around and drink stuff. Thankfully I'm only nineteen, but just in case anyone thinks otherwise, I've been doing a pretty good job of proving that I’m not growing up any time soon, mostly by abusing Christmas trees and spilling stuff everywhere. Oh, and I bought Pokemon Diamond last week too.

My new hoover!
After brushing aside Gavin’s sensible financial advise, I impulsively went out and bought a shiny new bagless Tesco hoover, partially to help with the every day cleanliness of the flat but also to get rid of all the goddamn pine needles. It’s amazing, and I’ve been having a tremendous amount of fun hovering sofas, the bottoms of chairs and the kitchen ceiling.

Wednesday Nights!

Every Wednesday night I go out to a small pub and drink lots, before stumbling off to Ashton Lane and the thankfully unburned Vodka Wodka to drink more. At first some people talk about politics, but eventually they stop and we can converse about things closer to my heart, like whatever dated NOW compilation album they’re playing in the background, or anecdotes from Linlithgow that successfully alienate the majority of those present.

And there we have it. Now, if you could be so kind, please refresh the page a couple of times and go raking through the archive to boost my hits. Thank youuuuuu.

#427

So, it has been just over two weeks since the quite dreadful first year of law came to an end, and all has gone rather silent on the blog front. This is probably because I don't really have anything to avoid at the moment, other than catching up on the backlog of blog entries. Isn't that ironic?

I now have a spare few minutes to share my wonderous, wonderous tales of freedom with you, with the aid of pictures from my beloved new phone and an elaborate scoring system of wonderousness, on a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 equals shit, and 10 equals pure distilled B*Witching joy. Huzzah.

Ross and Gavin's trip to Platform 3
Girls Aloud and Our Run In With The Long Arm of the LAW.
Ross Spoilage Day
The Dumbass Builders
Return to Biddy Mulligans
The Ongoing Wreckers Trauma
Ice-cream, daisies, and sunbathing at the Loch
Farewell to Flat E
A tragic end for Snuffles


_{The results of my photographic spree are here.}

Oh yes. It's another blog. I like this one.

Look at how excited I am.