Posts tagged with "life"
Saturday, October 29, 2011 3:06:48 AM
consumer, soul, life, essence
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It’s not the food we eat that is important to our physical life; it’s what’s in the food. I don’t mean what scientists call the vitamins and minerals, I mean the LIFE ESSENCE that we are taking from the plant, animal and mineral kingdoms so that we can maintain life in our physical bodies that eventually age and run down ending in our own physical death.
Some would argue that death is just a natural part of life, and the never ending cycle. But I question that belief as why would anyone that desires life, be forced to die. It doesn’t make sense. Yes, there are some that desire choose death “unconsciousness” and want to die and so that ideology can apply to them, but not to those that desire life.
I believe that the reason our bodies age and run down is because of the denials and unloving energy we are holding that are a direct consequence of our denials of our Soul, (Intuition, feelings and emotions) Spirit, (Mind and thoughts) Body, and Heart that are also reflected in our unlovingness in killing and consuming other essence for their life essence (Light) to give us life.
We have forgotten that we need to receive our Light directly from the Source, instead of stealing it covertly by controlling, killing and consuming them. We humans have become a race of CONSUMERS with a furious and voracious appetite that is slowly killing the planet and everything upon it.
So how do we reconnect with our Source? How do we get our Light and eternal Life through the Source? How can we reverse the process we are now caught up in that we deem as our very survival? Humm? I think/feel this is a Spirit issue. I don’t know why I say that, it’s just what I felt.
Thursday, January 6, 2011 9:02:32 PM
denied rage, unloving, life, experience
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I’m seeing more and more how people are meeting their denials through their outer reflections, the things they experience in their life. The reflections are either by another person in denial, or by a person that is coming from a place of love, that is not accepting their denial based unloving energy and is sending it back to them. In either case, it will be an “opposite” refection, and they won’t like what they are seeing or hearing.
A simple example of denial meeting denial is when what they are doing, or trying to do to other people, is what they think other people are doing to them. It will be in different situations and experiences, so they are unaware of the connection. If they are controlling others and want them to do what they desire, then they will meet other people that will try to control them in a similar manner, and when that happens, there will be conflict, and both parties will be triggered into their denied issues and denied rage (expressed or unexpressed) will be the result.
When the person tries to control a person that doesn’t accept their denial based unloving energy and says no, then the person will have their own unloving energy reflected back to them and they will not like it as they feel they have no control. They will be triggered into their denied issues and will gap having denied rage either expressed or unexpressed, while the person that is not in denial, will not have any issues.
Thursday, January 6, 2011 8:59:50 PM
love, quote, denial, protectionunloving
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Some people say that I live in another world and that I’ve lost touch with reality. That I’m a loner, a misfit and off in my own little world, cocooned in a bubble to keep me safe and others out. If there is a bubble around me, it’s not for protection, but is love, self-love, the result of ending my denials. It’s not that I’m trying to keep others out, but that others don’t want to come into my space. When I feel the presence of denial and unloving energy being directed at me, I feel compelled to express myself, exposing their denials and unloving intent. If ending their denials is not their intent, then the result of our meeting is in them moving away from me and back to their right place.
I look forward to meeting a woman that I can connect with to further our mutual healing and self empowerment, and to also connect with others that have conscious intent to end their denials and heal and empower themselves, to experience life and love in a new world, and to bring Heaven to Earth.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010 8:31:05 PM
person, social, Paradox, death
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2010 Nov 03 7:45 am Although I am personally choosing to end my denials, I am still in denial, both consciously and unconsciously. The paradox and irony that surfaces is that when I choose to end my denials and have acceptance for the other parts of me, that in the process, I reject and deny another person. In ending my denials and doing what is loving to me, I appear to be a hypocrite, by denying and rejecting others. But when you really look and feel into it, what I’m doing is loving myself, while rejecting that which is unloving and trying to control me in some way, shape or form.
If I didn’t express my opposition to what I feel and consider is unloving and hateful (like what I was experiencing in my dream in my previous post) then I would be in denial. If I believed that I had to accept what others were saying or doing, even I felt it was unloving, then I would be in denial and unloving to myself. Like in the twisted religious belief of a self-sacrificing love that accepts any unloving abuse, believing that by accepting it, it can transform hate to love. Love can transform hate, but not by giving in to it, or by fighting it, but by being true to oneself.
You don’t have to accept what is unloving just to prove that you are a loving person. That belief is the basic flaw in our social and religious beliefs and that is where the paradox and hypocrisy lies. When you are being real and true to yourself, you reject and deny accepting whatever feels unloving by expressing yourself, and in doing that, you turn it away. You not only turn it away from you, but you also turn it away from its source of food, of energy, (you) that it has been feeding on as it feeds on love energy in denial of itself. When this unloving essence has no more food to feed on, it will either change or cease to exist.
Unloving energy vampires do not have, nor are they seeking life, but rather, they feed off of other essence that has and is life, but denies it and their power. The intent of these energy vampires is to control, manipulate, use and if need be, kill any essence that is love and is seeking life. By accepting, and not rejecting any unlovingness that is attacking you and feeding off of you, you are, by your denials, creating your own death. You are not only receiving unloving energy from the outside that is being directed at you, but you are also (by your denials) giving your power/energy (essence) away and also sending your own unloving denial energy at the loving part of you that wants to express and reject the unloving energy that it is feeling.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010 8:27:54 PM
awake, fighting, love, life
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2010 Nov. 03 Wed. 3:48 am. I’ve been awake for a couple of hours, tossing and turning, trying to get to sleep, but instead, I’ve been having thoughts of fighting all kinds of people in my mind, and over all kinds of different things and issues. I just now realized that these are not my thoughts, and that they either belong to Marian, , another person, or to society. It doesn’t really matter who they belong to, as I’m sending them back to where they came from. I then stated the following intent out loud.
“I send back this energy to whoever it is coming from. I do not accept them, and I reject any thoughts and energy that are not mine, or that are not of love and light, seeking life.”
I rolled over and within a few minutes, I drifted off to a peaceful sleep and awoke at 7:45 am
Wednesday, October 27, 2010 3:50:20 PM
RUOW, feelings, life, false
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In flipping through the TV channels I heard a line on a talk show that stuck with me. It was,
“Fake it till you make it”That got me thinking of the Right Use of Will (R.U.O.W) material and how a person that is of Spirit Polarity, or Will polarity in denial will “act” out their feelings and emotions. By that I mean that when they think their position of power is being threatened, or they can’t get what they want, they will exhibit actions that will, on the surface, look like they are expressing their real feelings and emotions, but in reality they are only acting in an attempt to regain control of the situation. If you “feel” into their “act” you will find that there are no feelings or emotions (including anger and rage) even though what you may be seeing and hearing says that there are.
The reason you don’t “feel” anything is not because you are numb or dumb, but because they are no emotions, only the “acting” out of feelings and emotions much like an armature actor that tries to express something that they have never experienced, or felt, and are merely pretending or “acting” as if they were real feelings and emotions. Another example of this act is a child that cries “alligator tears” in an attempt to get what it wants. This “act” applies to every aspect of everyday life (however subtle) where a person portrays a false persona to give the illusion, or image of what they want others to perceive, and to not expose what they are really are feeling.
A common example of this act and façade is evident in our everyday greetings that we hear and use all the time like:
Person #1 asks, “How are you?”
Person #2 responds, “Fine, and you?’
Person #1 replies, “Great, couldn’t be better.”
All this “shit chat” is really a charade, a mask to hide the truth.
Lying, Omitting, Avoiding and Denying are so much a part of our social mentality that we take it as being real life. We can fake it all we want, but we are never going to make it, or experience REAL LIFE, unless we begin to be REAL, and we can only do that by getting rid of the LOAD (the false persona) that we are carrying and presenting as being who and what we are.
When I downloaded the picture of the seagull, I thought of how the seagull was blowing smoke out its ass, pretending it was a jet, and how people are also doing that, except that people are blowing it out of their mouths.
Monday, March 1, 2010 3:58:51 AM
blinded, truth, life, denial
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2010 Feb 23 2:35 a.m. I awoke from a dream and wrote the following.
We search for a key to adore that we think is locked, when all we need to do is to step forward and raise our hand and the door will open. Fear is what holds us back. The door is not death, but life and what we are experiencing now, is not life, but death. While we think that the door leads to the unknown and death, it is merely the door from whence we came.
Death is not the fate that awaits us on the other side of the door. Death is on this side of the door that we are living and experiencing now. We have already opened the door and walked into the valley of death, now we need to choose to turn around and walk out of it. Not by dying and giving up what we call life, but by dying to the old imprints, programs and beliefs, and giving up the denials of self love that had been creating our living death.
We are afraid to turn around; to do the opposite of what we believe will keep us safe and away from death. We have been taught and naively believe that what we are experiencing is our lot in life. That suffering is the result of some past transgression. We believe that we need to continue to struggle for life, but in reality, our struggle is creating our death, because our struggle is in denial of our self, even though we believe otherwise. We are blinded by the shadow of death, of denial that hides the truth. We can’t see it for what it is, and believe we must endure to the point that we can no longer endure and maintain life, and must physically die. This is not living, but dying.
JR
Wednesday, January 6, 2010 3:06:04 AM
soul, death, body, life
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’09 Jan 03 9:39 am Sunday. I feel we have misinterpreted the idea and belief that our physical body is just a temporary home for our Spirit and Soul, and that death of the physical body is a natural process and progression of life. I feel that our human body is not meant to die as a means to end our Earthy incarnation and experiences, but rather that our stay on the earth plane with our physical body is what is temporary. By that I mean that instead of dying a physical death,
I feel that in the future, we will be able to take our physical body (healed and youthful) with us when we decide our earthly sojourn is complete. It is then that we choose to visit another realm of existence. Not to say that we have to remain in human form, if that form is not conducive to the experience we desire. I feel that we have the ability to change form
(shape shift) from one form to another, and I also feel we can do that here on the earth plane if we desire. Now just how we do that is a mystery to me at this moment, but I feel that that is part of what I am working on at this time.
JR
Saturday, January 2, 2010 10:37:58 PM
death, love, life, value
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’09 Jan 01 7:51 pm I had an Epsom salts bath tonight and during my soak, I had the thought that people who value “life” based on what they will lose when they die, don’t value life, but death, and their denied fear of death. Those who value life are grateful for what they have, and will experience, but… the old proverbial but… we can’t be in that space until we have healed all our issues that cause us to think otherwise, and just saying that we are grateful doesn’t mean that we are.
Of course there is always the case to be stated that we are Spiritual beings and that we are immortal, but dying a physical death is not an example of our immortality put into practice. Death is not a “natural” part of life, as anyone or anything that desires life, does not seek death.
Hummm? As I’m writing this post I flashed to an old message I got a few years ago, that
“To know what love is, we need to know what love is not.”As I typed that, I got that,
“To know what life is, we need to know what life is not… Death.”I don’t know where this is going, but I thought I would share it as I’m sure that it will be relevant to what is to come.
Food for thought.
JR
Wednesday, December 30, 2009 3:40:53 AM
mentally, death, tree of the knowledge of good and evil, physically
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Dec 25 7:02 am I feel there is something inside me that is attacking me on all levels, attacking me from the inside out and that is what my body is reflecting to me. This thing is, and has been attacking me mentally, emotionally and physically, and it’s my physical body that is now showing signs, the scars of this inner battle through aging and disease. This thing inside me is unloving light that has been fueled by my ignorance and denials. (I just went blank, it's like someone is trying to stop me)
It doesn’t want me to know the truth of what it is and how to get it out of me as that would end its ability to control and feed off of me. It also fears that if it loses one, it will lose all [the shepherd and the flock] and so….. (I went blank again)
I’m now thinking of the Garden of Eden and how Adam and Eve were told not to eat of the tree of knowledge of good and evil that was in the middle of the garden along with the tree of life. I feel that the knowledge of good and evil also related to the tree of life. I’ll have to check that out in the Old Testament… (Blank again)
King James Version
Genesis 2:9 And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for food; the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: 17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
Genesis 3:4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die: 5 For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.
22 And the LORD God said, Behold, the man is become as one of us, to know good and evil: and now, lest he put forth his hand, and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live for ever: 23 Therefore the LORD God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken. 24 So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of lifeI read the above verses and like everything else in the bible, (and other books) there are a lot of conflicting statements which I feel are intentionally meant to confuse and befuddle, to keep one ignorant, and therefore be a self fulfilling prophecy. Self-empowerment is all about challenging ones beliefs, not defending them and so I now search for a link between “the knowledge of good and evil” (which I have done in part with my healing experiences and “the tree of life,” that of healing my Body and eliminate aging.
I know that this light is Luciferian, of unlovingness, denials, power, control, judgments and that it is attached to me, in me, not just now in this life time, but that it has been for all existence, just as it has been to God. (another blank)
Hummmm? I just flashed to a post I read on facebook that resonated with me. It said, “Birth is Spirit becoming physical.” So maybe it’s not the physical body that I need to focus on, but on Spirit and releasing the old imprints, programs and beliefs that have been controlling all the other aspects of my being, my Mind, Will, Heart and Body. In as much as I’ve begun to release my Spirit [Minds] control of my Will to heal my personal lost Will, now I have to do the same with my Spirit, to recover lost Spirit and also Heart; and in the process, I’ll also be freeing my physical body of the unloving light its been holding that is causing illness and aging. My physical body is showing me the symptoms of what is wrong, what it is holding, it is not the cause of what is wrong with it. Aging and disease is not natural, nor is death and natural part of life as death is not a choice for those that desire life.
JR
Tuesday, March 31, 2009 2:18:59 AM
mistakes, unconditional love, insights, life
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’09 March 25 In the process of writing my second book and in various chats the past couple of weeks, I’ve come up with a few noteworthy insights and quotes that I want to share with you.
“It’s not about finding and experiencing things that make you happy, it’s about being happy and excited about the things you are experiencing.” “Being habitually abused and a victim, means you are addicted to hate, both by others and your own self-hatred”
“You are afraid of being hated and rejected, because you are already doing a good job at it“
“Luck… Lucky... there are no coincidences and having good or bad luck is a judgment based on expectations. ““The first step to solving a problem is being aware and acknowledging that there is a problem”“After you have knowingly denied yourself for a third time, you are caught in the gap of your denial.” “Your best teachers are the mistakes you make” “You give your power away when you are in a state of denial.” 
“Judgments are thought form frozen in time and attached to the thinker.”“You are not afraid of death, but rather you are afraid of life.” “Awakening is not what you desire, as sleeping is what you know.” “Hindsight is when you realize what happened after the fact.
Foresight is when you apply hindsight to the present experience to gain insight
Insight is the moment when you realize that you are experiencing something different and unique.”“When all that is false has been removed, the truth is obvious.” “The Truth is simple, it is the denials and lies that are complicated.”
“Hope is a word based on expectation, that is used to replace the word doubt.” “I am not a skeptic, I am a seeker of the truth.”“Being in denial is known and comfortable, telling the truth isn’t.”“Unconditional Love begins with U.”JR
Wednesday, December 3, 2008 9:06:11 PM
issues, high blood pressure, imprints, eating
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’08 Nov 16 4:50 am Hummm? I was just thinking that I have border line “high” blood pressure and so what does that mean? Blood represents life, the life force and so my body is being pressured, or is under constant pressure.. Humm? Can this constant pressure be associated with sex and eating. Can they all be tied together with the feeling stress, anxiety, doubt and confusion and the unknown, even when I’m not consciously aware of it? By that I mean, that I’m running on imprints, programs and beliefs that are affecting my Body and life and I’m not even aware that they exist… 4:58 am…
5:02 am So now with Marian, I know and I can fell when she’s pressuring me to do something for her as I can feel it the moment that she is saying it. With her, it’s not about planning or remembering to do something later, but it’s got to be done right now, in this very moment. She’s and has been that way with everything, the house, dog, clothes, food, etc. when she thinks of it, she wants it and she wants it NOW…. There is no talking to her, as her mind is made up.
Yesterday she said that she had a damaged baby mattress in the car that she had picked up from Janice that she wanted me throw in the dumpster as it was too heavy for her. She also said that there was a bag of garbage that she had collected from the garage that she also wanted to be taken to the dumpster. I told her I’d take them later, as I was presently in the middle or working on editing my books for my website. I came downstairs around 3:00 pm to take the stuff to the dumpster and she informed me that she had already done it. I asked her how she lifted it as she had earlier said that it was too heavy for her. She smugly said that it wasn’t a problem. What I didn’t say at the time, as I didn’t think of it in the moment, as I was making my way back upstairs, was that if it wasn’t a problem and something that she could do, then why ask me to help? When I thought of it I also felt my denied Will rage wanting to go back downstairs to attack and take a piece out of her for the game she was playing with me.
I don’t know how I can heal this in the present moment, but I’m sure that things will come to a head in order for it to be healed. I also feel that this relates to any other activity that is used as a diversion when activated into pour imprints and issues.
JR
Monday, September 1, 2008 1:51:04 AM
Lucifer, mass consciousness, collective consciousness, life
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’08 Aug 30 3:50 am Although I’m just becoming aware of these thought form attachments and thought forms and how huge this really is, it really hasn’t sunk in. I think that I’m in shock at the realization and just how big and powerful it is, yet has gone unnoticed it is as it silently drifts from one person to the next, like neuron transmitters in the brain, transferring information and controlling us at the same time. Keeping us is a state of suspended animation, asleep, slumbering, and we call this dream like state life when in reality it’s just the opposite. This life is a dream, in that we as humanity are not living to our true potential but are rather living according to these subliminal thought forms that have so imprinted and programmed us that we believe them to be real and a normal part of living and life as they have been here for what seems like eternity.
This goes way back, and I don’t mean to our present recorded history, I mean back to Atlantis, Lumeria, and all the way back to Pan. Hummm? Back to Pan, Pangaea, back to the father warriors that said they were here to protect us and then, after the war in the Heavens, with the arrival of Lucifer (the Dark Wizard) and his band of denial Spirits, the fallen Angels. Since then, we, as humanity have been slowly losing not only our consciousness, but our powers because these subliminal thought forms of energy have attached themselves and have imprinted us into this unseen role of denial that has been playing out in our reality ever since.
R.U.O.W Book1 “Right Use of Will” Page 70 where the father Warriors invade earth to offer protection and then on page 74 where Lucifer, (the dark Wizard) brings death and the killing and eating of each other.
’08 Aug 30 4:02 am I just though that having to eat to live is another mass conscious belief and thought form that we all have in common, that we have to kill animals and plants in order to be able to live. In R.U.O.W this eating others goes back to Pan with Lucifer and his band of gangles (gang angels) where he convinced the original Spirits that never killed or ate another, that eating another was normal in the universe where he had come from.
Survival of the fittest is another mass conscious thought form where only the strong survive. Hidden in that thought form is the belief that feelings and emotions are to be controlled and suppressed and as showing any sign of feelings or emotions is showing ones weakness, and therefore, one is not strong and will not thrive or survive.
Having to work is another mass conscious thought form and yet another is working for a cause, for the good of all. In other words, the individual is part of the collective consciousness, and it’s the collective consciousness that is important, while the individual is expendable. The hidden message is one of self-sacrifice for the common good and the soldiers battle cry in wars.
Conflict and war is yet another thought form created by our duality as any different point-of-view is seen as being wrong, and being wrong, it must be set right, and if the person doesn’t volunteer to change, then the only way to convince them is to overpower them physically, mentally and emotionally so that there is no conflict, but blind obedience, respect, loyalty, discipline and law and order. If we all follow the same rules and laws, then there will be no conflict, EXCEPT of course, those that are in a position of power can and do make EXCEPTIONS that involve them or their kind.
JR
Thursday, June 5, 2008 9:20:41 PM
life, normal, Lucifer, instinct
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’08 May 29 10:21 am while I was editing the chapter in my book on “clearing your astral plane” I came to the part of the inner critic and I felt that this inner critic was actually the unloving and reversed polarity light of Lucifer and rage, that wants to be in control of our Mind, Will and Body and also of everyone and anything that it comes in contact with.
This light is not only already in us by way of our imprints that were in place before we were born but it’s also shoved into us as children when we were mentally, emotionally and physically controlled, abused and attacked and where we had no choice but to take it in, to accept this unloving energy into our being. This doesn’t have to be a blatantly evil act, all that is needed is the overpowering of another, even with the use of so-called acts of love, or doing what is best for another.
In accepting that unloving energy into us, it takes over that part of our essence that we denied expressing, that now feels it isn’t worthy or good enough or whatever this reversed polarity light tells our Mind. Whatever the original external voices were saying that was controlling us is now what the inner critic uses in order that we control and continue to deny expressing our selves…
It’s our present life experiences when we are young that sets up these programs and beliefs, and it was further engrained and embedded in our subconscious every time we were confronted with a similar experience where we continue to deny our true expression and instead listened to the voice of this unloving inner critic, of Lucifer and denied rage. This unloving energy is imprinted into our very essence, our DNA, that we then consider as instinct, normal or natural, a way of life, or just the down side of being human.
How this relates to clearing your astral plane is that you need to become aware of what is you and what is not you… The inner critic is not you, unless of course, you are of unloving light essence and then you and your critic are on the same side and there is no inner conflict.
JR
Saturday, May 24, 2008 10:59:23 PM
denied rage, insight, life, rage
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For the past few weeks, I’ve been involved in a couple of discussions on Tribes RUoW group. One discussion thread was
“repost of the touchy subjects thread for all to care to look back or continue with discussion” and the other was
“Rage” It was the first topic, that touched off a series of activations and denied rage attacks. For me, it was interesting as I could see it all unfolding and I could also relate it to my healing experiences, except that in this case, there was no healing taking place, only Spirit’s (mind) denials and denied rage attacking others and Will’s (feelings) denials and her denied rage attacking internally.
I’d been sharing my personal experiences and insights for years and whenever I did, I was always met with either they didn’t like the messenger (me)... or the message I was sharing, or the way in which I presented the message..... and that was because they were already activated and re-acting to their imprints programs and beliefs that saw me as the problem.... I posted what I felt I needed to, even though there was all this denied rage flying around.... and while some of it was directed at me, I wasn’t activated by any of it.
Yesterday I felt a shift in the group and as I finished posting a reply to a comment on one of my previous posts and I had another insight (for lack of a better word)... I felt that I was seeing a butterfly beginning to emerge from its chrysalis, getting ready for the next stage of its life... It was like I was a witness to a miracle, a “new life” form... I also felt that it was time for me to pull back from the group and to let them sort out their healing process for themselves, that I felt was now about to emerge.
JR
NOTE: If you click on the links… in the upper right hand corner of the web page you will find --->
threaded | unthreaded | newest first <--- Click on
| unthreaded | as that will put the posts chronological order.
Monday, April 21, 2008 2:08:09 AM
death, nature, life, man
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’08 April 13 I was flipping through the TV channels and I came upon a Evangelical sermon and the guy made reference to and quoted…Luke 12:22-24
Luke 12:22 “And he said unto his disciples, Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat; neither for the body, what ye shall put on.
Luke12:23 The life is more that meat, and the body is more than raiment.
Luke12:24 Consider the ravens: for they neither sow or reap, which neither have storehouses, or barn; and God feedeth them: how much more are ye better than the fowls?”
I thought about it and my issues of manifesting and then it came to me that while there is a truth in the scriptures he quoted, it’s only a part truth. While the raven doesn’t sow, reap and store its food, it still has to find food and when it can’t find enough food in one place then it has to fly to another place or it starves. Also if the weather is too hot or to cold or to wet or too dry, then it must find shelter, or move to a place that is more bearable, in order for it to be able to live and find food and to rear its young.
It’s not just the raven, but all plants and animals are in the same boat. Everything feeds off of everything else... Everything is a consumer… This is not a creation without struggle, hardship, illness and death. Nature and all that is in it is not really different than Humans.
The only difference between Humans and nature is that Humans, with their technology, has the ability to act as God, to control nature, the plants and animals and even the very elements of the Earth. That also puts Humans at the top of the list in having the ability to create suffering, illness and death, not only with other forms of life but to themselves. Humans also have the ability to destroy all life on the Earth, including itself.
JR
Monday, April 21, 2008 2:05:15 AM
life, trees, young souls, old souls
’08 Apr 13 12:51 am Earlier in the evening I had been looking at a tree outside my bedroom window and I was thinking of how mush our life is like a trees life… Hummm! Interesting… the tree of life…
The tree starts out like we do with a sexual act with two cells joining and then growing to create two more and so on until it is able to establish itself as a seed. The seed then establishes contact with the Earth and the other elements of light (heat, fire), air, water and space and time, and it grows to experience itself and its relationships to other things that have also chosen to experience life on Earth.
I was then thinking of the structure of the tree from the roots, trunk, branches, twigs, leaves and flowers and how it goes though one cycle, one season, similar to our one life time. Then I thought about how new growth, new parts don’t replace the old, but are added to the old or existing growth. I was thinking of my previous writings on space and time and how a tree’s past (the old branches of yesterday) form the foundation of the new and present growth that will form the basis of future growth of tomorrow.
A young tree doesn’t occupy much space because it hasn’t had the (time) to grow and experience life like a tree that is older and has experienced more (time) on Earth and with that it’s also bigger, as it occupies more space. I was comparing the tree to Humans as we compare a child to an adult in the same way. We say that an adult has had more time/space experience than a young child.
Then taking that one step further, I could also see how and why some humans are called “Young Souls” while others that have had more incarnations and space/time experience, like the large and older tree, are called “Old Souls.”
Things that make me go Hummmm?
JR
Monday, March 24, 2008 11:58:27 PM
consumer, life, kill, gift
...
’08 Mar 22 Consume > Consumer> Destroy … Kill or be killed. Survival of the fittest. I was flipping through the TV channels and the above words caught my eye. As the words flashed on the screen I realized how we have become predicators, consuming and living off other life forms and not only destroying living beings, but also the ability to sustain life on Earth. I feel that’s why I was drawn to the sites I posted about in Posts 259 and 260. Consume and consumer is also related to post 265 Possess – possessions – possessed…
This also ties in with another thought I had and that’s about having to EARN a living… Life is a gift... so why do we have to earn the right to enjoy it? And that brings us back to money and wealth as being the present source of power that determines the kind of existence and life we experience….. as consumers.
I was also watching the TV news and the floods in the mid US and how people were losing all their possessions and I was reminded of what I wrote in my last post… That everything I’ve worked for and prepared myself for is no longer going to exist, and that life as I know it is about to change…. And then there’s the paradox to the present denial base, “consumer” driven society… and that is… the meek shall inherit the Earth.
JR
Sunday, March 23, 2008 2:54:04 AM
mural, women, ruins, life
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'08 March 05 I was watching Discovery Channel on TV about an Aztec ruin that was recently discovered that dates back to being the oldest yet uncovered. In the base of the pyramid they found a 200 foot long tunnel and a mural painted on the wall depicting their history and beliefs.
What drew my attention was the picture of a Aztec man holding a knife in one hand and his penis in another and it showed blood coming from his penis as if he had cut himself. The story went on to say that this ceremony was the letting of a man’s scared blood (penis) as a symbol of life, and then the painting glyphs went on to describe how it was related to human sacrifices and the shedding of blood to honor the gods so that nature and they (the people) would flourish.
I thought of how backwards it all was. Here they believed that it’s a man’s blood (penis) that is sacred while in reality it’s a woman’s blood (her natural menstrual cycle) that is sacred and the giver of life. They deny the truth and in its place, they created the belief that is the opposite of the truth… Talk about twisted…
JR
Friday, December 21, 2007 3:57:50 AM
money, divorce, love, life
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Dec 19 Tuesday, I was talking with a friend on the phone today and as we were chatting, she was picking up on my daughter, or what she felt as my daughter, as the feeling was of being depressed and wanting “daddy”.
I flashed back to when she was a child and she'd come running toward me full speed when I’d walk through the door after getting home form work. I’d bend down to greet her and she would literally leap into my arms and throw her arms around my neck and squeezed me with all her tiny might as she kissed me on the check with pressed lips. She never wanted to let go and often I had to tickle her in order to get her to release her hold on my neck which at times was beginning to choke me. She would then take my hand and begin to show me all the things that she had been doing that day and to also play with her.
I miss that little girl. I miss my son too. I was telling my friend that when my son was ten and my daughter five, was also the time that my marriage and career was on the rocks. I was torn between getting a divorce, but I had too much guilt around leaving the children so I carried on for another nine years. I couldn’t get a job in Cable TV, so I focused on starting my own Cable TV planning and design consulting business called “Systems 80”. I threw myself into the business to avoid having to face and deal with the “home” issues. In three years, the business grew to 12 employees, but no amount of money made my wife or our life happy.
As I shared that with my friend I realized that
I was pushing love out of my life, so that I could earn money, so that I could have love in my life. And what a fucking joke that is! My friend said that that is what we do at Christmas… we are buying love and thinking that when we are giving and getting presents, we are giving and getting love.
Later, that afternoon, I felt I needed to connect with my daughter and I called her when she got home from work, but she was just on the way out to do some shopping for “presents”.
JR
Thursday, December 6, 2007 7:55:38 PM
programs, guilt, imprints, live
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A couple of months back I wrote a few thoughts on desire and love in little pocket note book that I carry with me to work. In it, I wrote that I feel that my desire is wrong and that the program I have is that what I desire isn’t right.
As I typed the above for this blog post I heard my mother’s voice and her cutting words, “be grateful for what you have, the roof over your head, the clothes on your back and the food on the table. There are a lot of kids out there that don’t have what you have so be grateful for what you have and stop your whining and complaining" --- Guilt is what she gave me there instead of love and the truth. The truth was that we didn’t have the money so that we could have and do what others had and could do, but she was feeling guilty and too ashamed and proud to admit it so she quilted and blamed our desire as wrong.Others oppose, or deny my desire because they have no acceptance for it.
As I typed in the above sentence I felt that this is another program I have, in that I can’t be the leader, that I have to be a follower because my ideas and desires are not good enough or right and that others are better than me because their ideas and desires are accepted whereas mine are rejected and shunned. I also have another program in that I need acceptance of my desire (by others) before I can even accept it, and isn’t that just fucked up!
Desire is like unconditional live. It’s all about YOU and what you want and desire and not about what makes others people happy. As I wrote that in my book, I heard a soft voice ask. “
You have desire to heal, but do you have the desire to live?”
Unconditional Love is a state of being, being in the present moment without expectation or condition. Unconditional love sees joy and happiness in the present moment and in all past moments.
Whereas, conditional love is based on our imprints, programs and beliefs and on the past as it has expectations on any future experiences based and referenced to the past. The “now” or present moment is not being lived or experienced as it is being used to either re-live a past experience that brought pleasure, or, if there is a fear and an undesirable issue, then the present moment is used to find ways in which not to re-live the past experiences.
A few days ago when I got the insight that I mentioned in Post 212 a friend commented on my other blog in Tribe and said…
“Perhaps the next step is to be passionate about being passionate and love loving and living! Since you have no fear of fear it should be a fun and joyous ride!” I feel that comment also ties in with what is going on now.
Once I clear my old imprints, programs and beliefs of what my desires are based on making other people happy, then may desire will be like a blank canvas, limited only to my imagination.
JR
Tuesday, November 27, 2007 12:34:03 AM
obesity, light, control, attention
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I watched a TV show last night on obesity in America and what I was feeling from the various people during the show was that while some people over eat as a way to avoid feeling their emotions that they feel they can’t express, there is another more sinister sector of the obese society that eats as a way to gain recognition and receive attention and others, and that use their obesity as a form of control over others.
Those wanting attention don’t really care what attention they get, as any attention they get means that someone is focusing on them and that means that their energy is also focusing on them and that is what they are feeding off of. They’re feeding and feeling good, off of the emotional and mental energy of other people.
Others that are obese are in it for the control that it gives them over other people as some feel obligated to try help them as they are family, and others, feel sorry for them and try to “save” them, and change them from their unhealthy life style.
These obese people will cry “oh poor me” yet when given the opportunity to help themselves, they either deny they have problems and refuse help, or they take the help just as long as it gives them the attention or the control that they desire, and when they are no longer given the attention and help, they return to their old habits because they know that that will get them what they want. Of course they will deny and say that it is either genetic, hormonal, or a host of other problems that they can’t control.
************************ ****************************** **********************
I also realized that these people have chosen
death and that they are merely staying alive to enjoy what they are experiencing even though they will deny and claim otherwise. If "life" was their choice, then they would be doing something about their situation and they would be taking responsibility for their choices and actions.
I was talking with a friend about the TV show and during our conversation it became quite obvious to me that if one is not choosing life, then by default, they are choosing death. There is no middle ground here of a, maybe, perhaps, or sometimes…. it’s either one or the other and denial is what is creating death.
************************ ****************************** ***********************
This also ties into what I was thinking when I woke up this morning in that some people have a light, force, energy, essence, that creates or animates “
life” inside them that shines through their eyes and their being that you can feel. Then there are the “others” that while they may appear to be full of life, there is little or no life force or essence inside them and what they do have, actually belongs to other people, as they have “taken” the light, “life” or part of it, from a person that has it. And the person that has this light, this life force, gives their light, their power away whenever they are in denial of any part of themselves.
JR
Friday, November 9, 2007 4:09:29 AM
life, biopsy, heartbreak, struggle
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’07 Nov 05 I've been "off" for a few days... feeling disconnected. I go between feeling numb to feeling heartbreak and then to a weird form of anger and rage.
I have an appointment with the doctor tomorrow and he's going to do a biopsy on my mark that appears to be getting bigger. I have a fear that it's cancerous and as it's so close to my genitals that I could also could have prostrate cancer and maybe it's even spread into my Lymph system.
I also have a feeling of what's the use__ why fight? Why struggle to heal if you only end up dying by some hideous disease that eats away at you until you are not able to physically survive.
That then leads to a feeling of heartbreak. If I can't help myself, then I can't help others. And where is God and why does he allow this to happen? And if God doesn't care and can't help me, then what's the point?
And then it's back to anger and rage at God and since I can't do anything to God. I go numb...
Maybe it's all a projection and it's not reality? Maybe and maybe not?
* * * * * * * * * * * *
As I typed that I remembered how I felt the same way about God when our family was excommunicated from the Catholic Church because of what I did or rather didn’t do. That’s another story that I’m not going to go into at this time.
I keep getting the feeling that “Ja kar far qua” is around me and that he has something to do with my mind going numb. I was in a text chat with a friend and the name came up again. It sounded vaguely familiar so afterwards I checked my list of entities that have been around me in the past and sure enough Jakar was there. He is associated with manipulation, illusionists, hope and faith. I feel that the name “Far qua” is another entity that is his partner.
4:44 pm I felt a brief moment of wanting to be held and cradled and then I wanted the nurturing and loving care of a Mother. That’s one thing that I haven’t experienced… I was going to say in this life time, but I felt that it was bigger than that and that it’s something that I’ve never experienced in all my existence.
8:12 pm I was having a shower and I was feeling how this is all about survival and the feeling of wanting to live yet at the same time feeling that life or rather a happy and loving life is not what one is supposed to have as there is also the feeling that there is no acceptance from God or you or your plight. You want and desire love and life but all that you’re able to experience is the opposite.
JR
Monday, September 10, 2007 2:37:42 AM
river of life, blood, life, heart
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'07 Sept 08 4:37 a.m. I’m still sweating and I just went to the bathroom and then downstairs to re-fill my water bottle. And then I came back to bed and began writing this entry in my journal. In all this time, I never felt COLD. I felt the odd sensation of “coolnees” against my skin from the damp T-shirt but I was never cold.
***********************************
A friend of mine who reads my blog, e-mailed me and said;
* Your truck is not the issue but it represents an issue of movement.
* Do you feel like your truck? Have you blown a gasket? Are you oozing black shit? * Are you feeling trapped/stuck? Covered in negative ooze? Doubts, fears...
* Check you heart. How's your cholesterol? Are your arteries clogged? Filled with the black ooze of deceit. Who has betrayed you?
************************************
At first I didn’t’ get it but now it makes sense. The truck is about leaking energy and represents my Blood and my Heart. It’s what my Heart has been holding and that my arteries, veins and blood are contaminated with the light of Lucifer and the Psychopathic Killer and it’s them that are stealing my freedom, health and life.
I can’t move forward as long as I have them inside me causing me to loose my blood flow and my life. I ask for help in moving the psychopathic killer and Lucifer lout and off of me and I ask that Love, Life and Light fill me in these places.
4:48 a.m. It’s your blood that’s your life line in your body. It gets oxygen from the lungs and gets rid of carbon Dioxide. It’s gathers nutrients from the stomach and small intestine. It is a transport river of constant movement. It’s either bringing things in or helping take things out. Without the Heart and the blood and blood system human life wouldn’t exist. Every aspect of our body is important, but blood plays a vital role that’s hard to describe. But there is also more to Heart and Blood than the physical. There‘s also the Heart Chakras and the interconnected systems to the other chakras and to our other non-physical bodies. And then we also have the Heart Essence, love.
JR
Monday, August 27, 2007 3:02:58 AM
R.U.O.W, love, life, emotions
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The
R.U.O.W. material came out in 1984 and I’ve been involved with it since 1997. I had my first healing experience in 1999 and my awakening in 2001. I was personally involved with two people that were also using this material and they were actually the ones that helped me do some of my early healing and yet, as unbelievable as it seems, they are still going around in same old circles and being activated into the same old issues, as they are ”stuck” on their point of view.
I’ve “been there done that” so I know what they’re going through and I also know what is needed for them to get themselves un-stuck, but nothing I say is heard and like my other personal experiences and with those on the internet, I’m rejected and accused of being an insensitive know-it-all and of being holier than thou. Although I could understand why unloving people rejected me, I couldn’t figure out why loving people in denial also rejected me. I’ve recently had several insights as to why, and the biggest one was that these people are not ready yet and they don’t have the “intent” or heart to do what it takes to love themselves. They think and say they love themselves unconditionally, but that’s not the truth because they don’t know what love is.
For years, I’ve searched for like minded, feeling and intent people and I’ve been in numerous internet groups and I’ve even been contacted by people involved in R.U.O.W. but I have yet to find one person that I feel is of genuine loving intent and is “walking their talk.” I see and hear people boasting that they have been working with R.U.O.W. for 18 or 20 years, as if time or was some sort of criteria for healing and evolving. They talk about doing emotional work, releasing judgments and doing body work but none have the intent and Heart presence to commit to action, what R.U.O.W. has to offer, to walk their talk.
Most of the R.U.O.W material puts emphasis on healing and evolving the Will, the feeling and emotional body and while that is what most R.U.O.W.’ers seem to be doing, there’s more to it, and they have missed the Key point. It’s not mentioned very often in the books but the Key to any and all healing has to begin in the Heart, not the Will. Healing begins in the Heart because if you can’t come from a place of love, as real as you can be in the moment, then any work you do is not only wasted, but also serves to widen the gap in healing the Spirit and Will or any other parts of our being. In order for real unconditional love and acceptance to be expressed, the Heart needs to be healed as it’s also in the gap. When you have real “intent” to heal you also have Heart presence, then and only then can you begin to heal your Will and Spirit, to find balance and to “walk your talk.” Without Heart presence, Spirit can’t accept the Will feelings, and the Will can’t accept Spirits understanding. Without Heart, it’s an “act” of love and not loving presence. The Will isn’t going to open to what it feels is unloving, no matter what Spirit says, as love is something that is felt and you can’t fool the Will if unconditional love is not present.
I did a quick search of my R.U.O.W books (my index on the blank pages in the back) and I found a few pages that I had referenced as Heart. I’m not going to quote them, I’ll just give you the page numbers for you to look up, except I did quote the last one just for food for thought.
Book 1 Blue Book Right Use of Will Page 6
Book 2 Purple Book Original Cause Page xi
Book 5 Yellow book - Heart song. Page 49, Page 115, Page 186, Page 189, Page 192
Book 8 Indigo – Indigo Page 249 “To find balance now means going back over the pieces and putting them back together again, even the missing, not vibrating and seemingly dead pieces, but finding the balance point is necessary and it is your journey to self awareness that never took place in the beginning or We would not have the healing on Our hands that We do, but no matter how it looks to you now, healing can be found if you have a loving heart, because that is where the balance point is going to be found. “
Since my recent insights, I’m no longer going to search for other R.U.O.W. groups or people, instead, I'm going to let them find me. My vision and intent is to create a Web space where people that have loving intent, can come to learn, share and heal and move what they can when they can and where we can help each other in a loving way. It is my intent that the ideas and works that will be discussed within this space will not only expand your consciousness, but also activate your emotions and touch your heart. I don’t have all the answers, but I am dedicated to healing myself and to live the “life” I have yet to dream, imagine and explore as we bring Heaven to Earth. If this is your dream, desire and intent, then welcome to
The Heart Centre.John
"Healing begins in the Heart"
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