scootercats

The Ebonies

Monday, 30. June 2008, 19:13:34

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Comments

Dacotah # 30. June 2008, 19:28

Very nice poem Debbie.

scootercats360 # 30. June 2008, 19:33

Thank you. I was a kid when that poem came to me to write down. It's a little dark, but I think that's how I felt back then.

Dacotah # 30. June 2008, 19:41

You are welcome. I wrote a couple of poems too. I posted them on my website, a few have a voice of my friend reading them.

Ewwww........what is your avatar? A girl on her side with worms coming out of her eye and mouth?

scootercats360 # 30. June 2008, 20:36

You crack me up Carol.

It is still a pic of a cat's claw raaawwwrrr

I really am going to have to change that icon. LOL

Dacotah # 30. June 2008, 20:47

Is this what you see?

scootercats360 # 30. June 2008, 21:11

That is very strange looking

lokutus_prime # 30. June 2008, 21:12

There is a secret in the ebonies
A secret known to me
Of love and fear and death and hate and agonies at sea
The secret of the fiery hell and heavens we shall see.

The fading light it takes my breath and
Darkness takes my life
But still I hold the secret of the burning ebonies.

Dear Debbie,

This is uniquely impressive for the following 'technical' reasons:

It has an excellent rhyming meter.

It scans perfectly.

It feels intimate, personal.

Its narrrative is rich in imagination and description and intense expression

It is very much in the sort of symmetrical rhyming style that I would (have, and still do) sometimes use.

But now let me give my emotive response.

I like this very much. It's an excellent well written and a very fine piece of artwork in the form of a poem. In fact it resonates with me, strikes a chord, reminds me of one of the 'great' classics of poetry. The use of language is outstanding. If it were a painting in a gallery I would be standing gazing at it, absorbing myself in its vivid imagery, not wanting to tear myself away.

Have I told you this is a truly excellent set of verses?

Have I opined that it comes "from the heart"?

Now I have.

Thank you so much for sharing this.

If this is just one example of your work I encourage you to post more.

This example demonstrates you are a remarkable and very skilled poet.

PS: On a personal note... this poem could be extended, in fact as I got to the end I felt it had to go on, was not yet finished. The potential is very strong in this poem. I guess when you first wrote it, for what ever reason, in what ever mood, it 'rested' as it is? Perhaps you should consider this excellent poem as a continuing 'challenge' that waits more from your erudite and profound mind?

scootercats360 # 30. June 2008, 21:24

WoW! I really thank you and appreciate what you have said about this verse. I wish I could take more credit for it myself, but this is a true automatic writing. I did not think of a single thing in this verse.

What I mean by automatic is that while sitting in a class room, I was suddenly compelled to pick a writing instrument and do just that, write. And write as quickly as I could since the verse was flying through my consciousness. I was compelled on several occasions to do this, and I will share more soon.

I have never written another verse again nor have I felt that compelling desire to do so. I wrote in this manner for several years during adolesence and each year that went by the poems matured to what you see here. This is probably the last thing I ever wrote and it is very old as you can see.

scootercats360 # 30. June 2008, 21:47

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Automatic_writing

"Automatic writing is the process, or product, of writing material that does not come from the conscious thoughts of the writer. People who believe in "automatic writing" say that the writer's hand forms the message, with the person being unaware of what will be written. In some cases, it is done by people in a trance state. Other times the writer is aware (not in a trance) of their surroundings but not of the actions of their writing hand."

Now wikipedia also goes on to say that most people claiming automatic writing were frauds, but I can honestly say that between the ages of say 13 and 17 I did not know what fraud was let alone what automatic writing was. So I guess I just have to believe in myself.

Dacotah # 30. June 2008, 22:04

Debbie, I will show you how to link to people in this comment section. Just click edit and you will see how.

Dacotah

Where I put my name you can type in anything.

scootercats360 # 30. June 2008, 22:20

Thanks lady I'm on my way

scootercats360 # 30. June 2008, 22:24

I did it

Thanks

lokutus_prime # 30. June 2008, 23:08

"WoW! I really thank you and appreciate what you have said about this verse. I wish I could take more credit for it myself, but this is a true automatic writing. I did not think of a single thing in this verse. "haek

Debbie, you have surprised me with this revelation.

Shakespeare has one of his characters exclaim "....there are more things in heaven and earth than are ever dreamt of in your philosophy..."

This "automatic writing" action of yours, on that long ago day, produced the amazing poem that I refer to.

But it is not simply and "open and shut" fact.
However it happened, there seems no doubt that it apparently happened through yourself. You appear to be the author. This poem appears to be your own creation.

I am not a man who ever rejects any other person's beliefs. My philosophy experience always allows me to keep my mind wide open and to receive and examine extra-ordinary observations. What you tell me is unusual and the action that happened may never, on surface analysis, be explained by obvious means.

But again I say.....You appear to be the author. This poem appears to be your own creation.

My emotive mind encourages me to consider there may never be an apparent reason for what happened.

My rational side asks me to understand that there is a reason and it may well be buried in your own unconcious mind.

My reasoning side perceives that you should be able to again write such poetry of wonderful calibre. I therefore encourage you to write in what ever manner or way or means open to you and to simply let your feelings 'flow', as it were, out on to paper (or screen) and to have faith in your own ability that was nascent and is now born.

scootercats360 # 30. June 2008, 23:21

Oh how I wish I could be so articulate in my writing as you. My tougue sticks to the roof of my mouth at the thought of being so eloquent in my writing. I will however share more of what I have previously written in future posts.

* as I got to the end I felt it had to go on, was not yet finished * I also felt this way but did not what to spoil the beauty of the verse by adding my own ignorant additions.

I have done other art work in a similar sporatic and spontaneous manner (wood/stone carving)but never found the ability to stay in that state of inspired creativity or was blocked by external circumstance. I love that state of mind it is really a spiritual experience on many levels. For me anyway.

Somehow just this dialog we are having is very inspiring in itself. I have never written so much that meant so much in any other comment here.

Thank you!

lokutus_prime # 30. June 2008, 23:30

It is positive and encouraging - for you - to write down what you have just made as a reply.

Do not ever under estimate the power of your mind, or the profound feelings and natural ability that are seemingly dormant there.

It only waits for you to have the inspiration and self belief and the motive to unlock that ability.

YOU are your own key and you are able to explore your potential and release it in this regard, once again.

I am sure you will be able to do this.

The first step is to believe.

scootercats360 # 30. June 2008, 23:37

I believe!

Now down to work.

Dacotah # 30. June 2008, 23:49

You are welcome

1bluebox # 1. July 2008, 13:32

scooter, this is a good blog post! i've really enjoyed my visit this day! the comments are great too!

i very much enjoy my visits to your blog site and will continue to view. i too hope you will release that artist within you, because you have talent! imo!!!!!!

scootercats360 # 1. July 2008, 15:23

@ Carol

@ Deborah, thank you so much for your compliment and encouragements. I really appreciate what you have said. I have been giving much thought to turning my hand to some new writing and publishing my older work here for fun.

Dacotah # 1. July 2008, 16:04