blah blah blah is what i want to write but i don't know where to start 1.life 2.love 3.life lessons I've learned in the past 2years 4.how much I've grown over the years 5.drama drama drama i belong in a talk show lol
I'm really tired of going on diffrent sites trying to make friends and the only time anybody really talks to you, is if it has somthing to do with sex, my number or if i would share naked photos what happen to the good ole chatting,laughing making friends sites ughhh!!!!!!!! each site i go to has half naked girl competing for the most attenstion............
SO NOW THAT THERE OUT OF THE WOMB THEY STILL DONT MATTER SINCE THEY ARE NOT AN ADULT WELL??? I DONT UNDERSTAND I'M CONFUSED IF THERE IN THE WOMB THEY DONT MATTER IF THERE BORN ALIVE THERE HUMAN WHAT IS THAT?? THERE THE SAME THING WHEN THEY WERE MADE, BORN OR WHEN THEY WHERE BEING ABORTED DONT LIE TO YOURSELF THIE IS MURDER THINK ABOUT IT
TO LEAVE SOMEONE TO DIE LOOK HOW MANY BABIES THERE ARE BEING BORN
ITS A CHOICE PEOPLE GROW UP AND BEING COME A REAL ADULT WHEN THEY START TO THINK OF OTHERS AND NOT JUST THEMSELF (mother sacrifices her own life for son)
HOW CAN CAN ANYONE DO THIS WOULD YOU STILL CONTINUE TO ABORT THESE FULLY GROWN PEOPLE BECAUSE THEY WERE GOING TO BE ABORTED IN THE FIRST PLACE
I'm scared!!! tears just keep falling, i'm in pain and suffering i feel like garbage the syptoms might go away but it can come back
i dont have the heart of taking a chance of hurting the person i love the most.. how do you tell the guy you love the more than anything in the world that you have herpes and pray to god he dosent leave you
the man i see marrying and traveling the world with the one i want to protect and care for.. who would want a women who can possibly give there unborn child herpes
but if it will make him happy i have to learn to let him go even tho i'll never smile again..the thought of someone leaveing you because you caught something
makes me feel like trash i'm i suppose to die alone now my happy ending is no where to be found
my mom wont even let me kiss her cheek a girl who's been saving herself for her future husband caught something be just sharing abottle of water i'm very depressed at the moment
SO YEA... i went to the hospital again, and they checked up on me turns out i have herpes.. but the doctor said its nothing normal but i should have gotten it earlyer in a younger age so here read this ----->Overview Oral or mouth herpes is an infection caused by the herpes simplex virus, which affects only human beings. It can affect people at any age, though mouth sores are commonly found in children aged 1-2 years. Painful sores on lips, gums, tongue, roof of the mouth and inside the cheeks are caused by this virus. Fever and muscle aches may also follow. Three stages are noticed in herpes virus infection.
0_0 see um yea when he first said herpes i was like what the hell how i'm i suppose to get herpes when i havnt put things in my mouth that i shouldnt have so anyways...
being all in a panick i asked how did i get it he said well oh ummm you probly got it from someone whos gotten it he said you could get it by sharing your drinks with other people
ok read this part carefully-----> Incubation Period: The duration of time between the contact with the virus and the appearance of symptoms is called the incubation period. The incubation period of oral (mouth, lip or tongue) herpes is 2-12 days. Signs and symptoms will last for 2-3 weeks. The victim may suffer from fever, tiredness, muscle aches and irritability.
•The most intense pain caused by the oral sores occurs at the beginning making eating and drinking difficult. •The sores may occur on the lips, the gums, anterior portion of the tongue, inside of the cheeks, throat or the roof of the mouth. •Sometimes it is found that they extend down the chin and neck. •Neck lymph nodes can often swell and become painful. •Herpes of the mouth may cause a painful throat with shallow ulcers and a grayish coating on the tonsils in teenagers and patients who are in their 20s
>.< i started getting my fever on friday, i didnt see the sores i have now till sunday and everything written up there is whats happening to me right now
the doctor said it can be caused by stressed also and latly i been stressed out alot
so ok if you read through this whole thing you probly want to know if there is a cure well i learned in the hospital ok am not sure how to explain but read this
---->Avoid coming into contact with saliva, skin or mucous membranes of those who have got the sores. The sores and symptoms of oral herpes clear up in 2-3 weeks, but may reappear in stressful conditions. Hence leading a stress free life is very important
yup no more sharing my straw with anybody anymore >.< drinking water feels like a knife going down the inside of my throat
tell me what you think of the whole situation kk night night am little sleepy now so yea its gross and i dont think my boyfriend would go anywhere near me right now but heres some pics of my herpes this would be the back of my throat and this is my lips theres four on the bottom and two on top if you can tell
ok here more info on this ---->Anyone can become infected by the herpes virus, and once a person is infected the virus remains latent for life. Herpes viruses are spread from person to person by direct skin-to-skin contact and, sometimes, by respiratory transmission (coughing or sneezing).
Oral herpes is very common. About 50-80% (some estimates are as high as 90%) of Americans are thought to carry antibodies for HSV-1. Most people who are exposed to HSV-1 become infected but only 10% of those people have symptoms, such as sores, and experience recurring outbreaks of the infection. Of the 50 million Americans thought to be infected with HSV-1, most acquired the virus when they were children and only about 5% are bothered enough by HSV-1 to consider it a medical problem.
HSV-1 does appear on the genitals and sometimes on other areas of the body. Nurses and other health care workers have been known to get herpetic sores after the virus has entered a break in the skin of their fingers.
Though rarely fatal, HSV-1 can be serious if cold sores occur in newborns, the chronically ill, or the elderly.
herpes is not a sexually transmitted dieases The highest risk for spreading the virus is the time period beginning with the appearance of blisters and ending with scab formation. However, infected persons need not have visible blisters to spread the infection to others, since the virus may be present in the saliva without obvious oral lesions.
but you can pass it during sex like rubbing a cold sore on you parthers private area The highest risk for spreading the virus is the time period beginning with the appearance of blisters and ending with scab formation. However, infected persons need not have visible blisters to spread the infection to others, since the virus may be present in the saliva without obvious oral lesions.
Viruses are different from bacteria. While bacteria are independent and can reproduce on their own, viruses enter human cells and force the cells to make more of the virus. The infected human cell is usually killed and releases thousands of new viruses. The cell death and resulting tissue damage causes the actual cold sores. In addition, the herpes virus can infect a cell and instead of making the cell produce new viruses, it hides inside the cells of the nervous system. This is called "latency." A latent virus can wait inside the nervous system for days, months, or even years. At some future time, the virus "awakens" and causes the cell to produce thousands of new viruses which cause an active infection
This process of latency and active infection is best understood by considering the cold sore cycle. An active infection is obvious because cold sores are present. The first infection is called the "primary" infection. This active infection is then controlled by the body's immune system and the sores heal. In between active infections the virus is latent. At some point in the future, latent viruses become activated and once again cause sores. These are called "recurrent" infections. Although it is not known what triggers the latent virus to activate, several conditions seem to bring on infections. These include stress, illness, tiredness, exposure to sunlight, menstruation, fever, and diet.
a lot of people say well its not a baby yet well then why would you want to get rid of if if its not a baby or going to be a baby wheater its only a couple of months old or weeks, its still life
when a women knows shes pregnant she dosent think oh no i'm carrying a rock i got to get rid of it, they know its going to be a baby
i do not have the heart to considering of diciding wheater something or someone should live
when babies are born people feel more sympohty towards it but they dont understand that
it can cry out for help help while an unborn child is in the womb you can make the decision to keep it or not,
it can not cry out, or say pleaze give me a chance to live it puts its life in your hand, its blood is on your hands no ones elses
you can not say well am not ready or prepared it was an accident i'll make up for this one by having another one sometime later on
am too busy, i have no time this isnt a plant or a pet this is a human being trying to grasp for life and for you to brush it of like it was nothing
its just the same thing as being a murderer.
just because it has not experianced life or had thougts or experianced feelings such and love, hate or guilt it dosent mean it isnt human we learn these emotions by living our life
There are many methods of abortion. The procedure used depends largely upon the stage of pregnancy and the size of the unborn child.
At Eight Weeks At eight to nine weeks the eyelids have begun forming and hair appears. By the ninth and tenth weeks the preborn child sucks her thumb, turns somersaults, jumps, can squint to close out light, frown, swallow, and move her tongue.
At this early stage of development, suction abortions are performed using a smaller tube, requiring little dilation of the cervix. This is called "menstrual extraction." However, if all the fetal remains are not removed, infection results, requiring full dilation of the cervix and a scraping out of the womb Suction Aspiration
Suction Aspiration This is the most common method of abortion during the first 12 weeks of pregnancy. General or local anaesthesia is given to the mother and her cervix is quickly dilated. A suction curette (hollow tube with a knife-edged tip) is inserted into the womb. This instrument is then connected to a vacuum machine by a transparent tube. The vacuum suction, 29 times more powerful than a household vacuum cleaner, tears the fetus and placenta into small pieces which are sucked through the tube into a bottle and discarded
AT TWELVE WEEKS By the end of the third month all arteries are present, including the coronary vessels of the heart. Blood is circulating through these vessels to all body parts.
The heart beat ranges during this fetal period from 110 to 160 beats per minute. All blood cells are produced by the liver and spleen, a job soon taken over by the bone marrow. White blood cells, important for immunity, are formed in the lymph nodes and thymus.
Vocal chords are complete, and the child can and does sometimes cry (silently). The brain is fully formed, and the child can feel pain. The fetus may even suck his thumb. The eyelids now cover the eyes, and will remain shut until the seventh month to protect the delicate optical nerve fibers.
Salt Poisoning (Saline Injection): Used after 16 weeks (four months) when enough fluid has accumulated. A long needle injects a strong salt solution through the mother's abdomen into the baby's sac. The baby swallows this fluid and is poisoned by it. It also acts as a corrosive, burning off the outer layer of skin. It normally takes somewhat over an hour for the baby to die from this. Within 24 hours, labor will usually set in and the mother will give birth to a dead or dying baby. (There have been many cases of these babies being born alive. They are usually left unattended to die. However, a few have survived and later been adopted.)
AT EIGHTTEEN WEEKS The fetus is now about 5 inches long. The child blinks, grasps, and moves her mouth. Hair grows on the head and body.
Dilation and Evacuation (D&E) This method is used up to 18 weeks' gestation. Instead of the loop-shaped knife used in D&C abortions, a pair of forceps is inserted into the womb to grasp part of the fetus. The teeth of the forceps twist and tear the bones of the unborn child. This process is repeated until the fetus is totally dismembered and removed. Usually the spine must be snapped and the skull crushed in order to remove them.
20 weeks: The child can hear and recognize mother's voice. Though still small and fragile, the baby is growing rapidly and could possibly survive if born at this stage. Fingernails and fingerprints appear. Sex organs are visible. Using an ultrasound device, the doctor can tell if the child is a girl or a boy.
AT SIX MONTHS the unborn child is covered with a fine, downy hair called lanugo. Its tender skin is protected by a waxy substance called vernix. Some of this substance may still be on the child's skin at birth at which time it will be quickly absorbed. The child practices breathing by inhaling amnionic fluid into developing lungs.
Prostaglandin Chemical Abortion This form of abortion uses chemicals developed by the Upjohn Pharmaceutical Co. which cause the uterus to contract intensely, pushing out the developing baby. The contractions are more violent than normal, natural contractions, so the unborn baby is frequently killed by them -- some have even been decapitated. Many, however, have also been born alive.
Hysterotomy or Caesarean Section Used mainly in the last three months of pregnancy, the womb is entered by surgery through the wall of the abdomen. The technique is similar to a Caesarean delivery, except that the umbilical cord is usually cut while the baby is still in the womb, thus cutting off his oxygen supply and causing him to suffocate. Sometimes the baby is removed alive and simply left in a corner to die of neglect or exposure.
AT 30 WEEKS For several months, the umbilical cord has been the baby's lifeline to the mother. Nourishment is transferred from the mother's blood, through the placenta, and into the umbilical cord to the fetus. If the mother ingests any toxic substances, such as drugs or alcohol, the baby receives these as well.
32 weeks: The fetus sleeps 90-95% of the day, and sometimes experiences REM sleep, an indication of dreaming.
Partial-Birth Abortion Five steps to a partial birth abortion:
1.Guided by ultrasound, the abortionist grabs the baby's legs with forceps.
2.The baby's leg is pulled out into the birth canal.
3.The abortionist delivers the baby's entire body, except for the head.
4.The abortionist jams scissors into the baby's skull. The scissors are then opened to enlarge the skull.
5.The scissors are removed and a suction catheter is inserted. The child's brains are sucked out, causing the skull to collapse. The dead baby is then removed. New study:preborn babies remember The unborn have memories, according to medical researchers who used sound and vibration stimulation, combined with sonography, to reveal that the human fetus displays short-term memory from at least 30 weeks gestation - or about 2 months before they are born....
what women want and what men want relationship advice that could help! alot of people try to figure out what is keeps a good marriage going
(this is advice for men) WHAT WOMEN WANT 1.affection 4.financial support 2.coversation 5.family commitment 3.honesty and openess
(note to men): if you cant make them ,then somebody else will
how to help: 1.praise your wife- NOT FLATTERY internal qualities (exp)-hunny with out you i dont know how i'll beable to raise our family
corny yes but women likes to be told how u admire thing they do
2.remove her fears- the top two things women fear the most is: loneliness and financial properties
3.provide time for intamate coversations-
4.delight her by fulling her small wishes- you get points for doing things without her asking you
5.building security in your wife-
(this is advice for women) WHAT MEN WANT 1.sexual fulliment- I'm not saying women dont have sex drives but its diffrent with men,sometimes it gets to the point were they go insane,some men get to the point where they dont care bout loosing the money, family, wife..(they will seek for it dont let them get it from another women)
2.recreational companionship-they want a playmate no not a playboy bunny, it means men wants someone they could do things with,sports,games,anything that they have liking to like a buddyand lover at the sametime
3.attractive spouse- no not surgery, theres nothing wrong with wearing jewelry and make up, also internal qualities
4.domestic support- domestic means: of or pertaining to the home, the household, household affairs, or the family
HOW TO HELP(dont do's) 1.showing greater admiration for other men
2.rejecting his leadership in the household (not meaning letting him abuse you but to listen to him)
3.making him relive his pass mistakes (dont do that)
4. resisting physical affection men wants to be able to hold you and useing it against them as a punishment for something they did wrong, they will go find it from another women if yo cant give it to them...
simpler help for women: 1. dont go longer than 2weeks without making love to your men
2.dont be a bitch nothing worst than someone yelling at yo all the time or being snoby
3.trust or get out
4.dont be clingy men need space
5.keep the relationship fresh dont make your men bored make them keep wondering
6.dont let money rule your heart you'll never find what its like to love
7.love yourself men love nothing more than a confident women her smile, her personality and so on remind them why they fell in love with you
reason to leave him: 1.do not stay in a abusive relationship
WAT YOUR ABOUT TO SEE HERE IS TOP SECRETE I WASN'T HOW I LOOKED LIKE MY WHOLE LIFE THERE WAS A TIME WHERE MY FACE WOULD BREAK A MIRROR PLZ GIVE ME YOUR HONEST OPINON
i was 12 at this time,and now am 16 NOW i took this today i been mad bout how much i weight....
BEFORE this was me on my 12 birthday yes go ahead luagh, who ever said that words dosent hurt could go and shoot themselfs
be honest dont hold back cause this is important for me i need closure... -take deep breathes-
i know everyone has something they hate bout themself or this like well i wish i was a lil taller lil skinnyer,i wish my nose was alil smaller, and my breast where just a lil bigger and this birth mark on my left leg, i wish it would just dissapear
i have strech marks on my shoulder from when i was 12 there fading now but they look terrible,
well i think thats bout it mom always told me nobody can be perfect i know that so why do i still wish i was
AM SORR WHEN YOU SLEEP I CANT HELP BUT
JUST STARE AT YOU,I'M SORRY IF I HAVE FRIGHTEN YOU
MY LOVE FOR WHEN YOU AWOKE U SAW MY EYES AS
BIG AS THE SHINING MOON STAREING AT YOU,YOU HAVE FELL OF THE BED
FRIGHTENED AS IF I HAD A PLOT TO KILL YOU IN YOUR SLEEP,
WHEN YOU WOKE THE NEXT DAY I MADE YOU A NICE BIG
I GAVE YOU A BIG GRIN AND AND A KISS ON THE CHEEK
YOU LOOKED AT YOUR PLATE IT HAD
BACON SMILE WITH TWO SUNNY SIDE UP EGGS FOR ITS EYES
I WAS POURING U COFFIE, BUT WHEN I HANDED YOU THE MUG
I SPILLED IT ON UR PANTS
SO YOU HIT YOUR KNEE ON THE TABLE, AND I APOLIGIZED
BUT WHEN LOOKED AT YOUR BREAKFAST THE KETCHUP HAS SPILLED ALLOVER
YOUR PLATE AND NOW THE PLATE WITH ONCE A SMILE, NOW LOOKS LIKE A SEEN OF
A CRIME FOR ONE OF THE EYES HAD BEEN BUSTED OPEN
AND THE BACON SMILE IS NOW A BROKEN JAW AND IT WAS THE SCENE
OF A FACE THAT AS IF A MAN HAS BEEN ROBBED IN AN ALLEY....
SO YOU DESIDED TO SKIP BREAKFAST AND HEAD FOR THE
SHOWER AND JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT YOUR DAY WAS ALL BETTER YOU HEARD THE
BATHROOM DOOR CREEK,
WHOS THERE YOU YELLED, YET NO ONE ANSWERED...SO YOU CONTINUED WITH YOUR
DAILY SHOWER AND THE SHOWER GLASS WAS NICE AND FOGGY NEXT THING YOOU KNEW
YOU LOOKED UP AT THE SHOWER THEN WHEN YOU LOOKED AT THE GLASS THERE WAS
A BIG SURPISE FOR IT WAS A SMILY FACE WHICH MOMENTS AGO WASNT THERE
FRIGHTENING YOU ONCE MORE, YOU SLIP ON WATER AND FELL
AND WHEN YOU WHERE JUST BOUT TO GET UP
TO HANDS SLAMMED ON THE GLASS CAUSING OU TO YELL
IN FEAR, THE OPENED THE GLASS DOOR AND ASKED WAT WAS THE MATTER WITH YOU?
YOUR EYES WERE WATERY AS IF THEY WERE GOING TO CRY, I CLIMBED
IN THE SHOWER AND I WENT CLOSE TO YOU YOU SMILED AT ME AND
GRABS MY ARMS AS MAKING ME FALL ON TO YOU AS WATER FELL ON US
YOU HELD ME CLOSE AND SAID I LOVE YOU
YOUR HANDS WERE ON MY HEAD HOLDING ME CLOSE TO YOUR
FACE AND YOUR OTHER ARM HELD ME CLOSE TO YOUR BODY
YOU HELD ME SO LONG THE WATER HAS TURNED COLD,
THEN YOU ASKED ME I DONT UNDERSTAND WHEN AND HOW I FELL FOR YOU?
YOU HAD NO IDEA HOW MUCH THOSE WORDS HURTE, FOR PART ME ME WAS STILL A
CHILD I TILTED MY HEAD DOWN AND AS YOU HELD MY BODY YOU FELT IT SHAKING FOR IT WASNT FROM THE
COLDNESS OF THE WATER, BUT FROM THE SADNESS, YOU HEARD ME CRYING
AND ASKED ME WHY, I LOOKED UP AT YOU WITH WATERY EYES AND THEN
I PULLED OUT A BOX FROM MY ROBES POCKET AND IT HAD A LITTLE BOW ON IT
I TOLD YOU HOW I WAS EXCITED FOR TO DAY WAS A SPEACIL DAY
AND I WANTED IT PERFECT...YOU OPENED THE BOX AND INSIDE WAS ALITTLE TRENKIT
A WATCH MADE OF PURE WHITE GOLD AND ON THE BOTTOM WAS THE WORDS
WRITTENED I PROMISED YOU FOREVER
YOU WERE SURPISED AND SAID I DONT GET IT
I HIT YOUR SHOULDER AND SAID ITS A BIRTHDAY PRESENT...
THEN YOU KISSED ME SO TENDERLY AND SOFT
AND I WHISPERED I LOVED YOU
YOU ASKED HOW MUCH I POUTED, AND THEN I TRIED
TO EXPLAIN BY SAYING FOR ALL THE ROSE PEDALS IN THE WORLD
IS HOW MUCHED I LOVE YOU
i have questions i asked myself who am i really if i saw my self in someones eyes who will they see... thats why i like to look at myself in diffrent views when i look at who i am really all i can ask is god please forgive me, what i have done,did or will do is not acceptable its hurts me
am sorry to the people who i've lied to am sorry to people who i have decived am sorry i told u things when my heart really means the oppisite
I know in my heart i belive god exsist so why do i still do wrong there enough proof in my heart his real dont get me wrong i asked myself how could he possibly be real?
0_0 lol wait this blog is suppose to be me confessing stuff lol but i guess not
OK LETS TALK BOUT GOD!!! 1.is he real?
2.if he was real would still listen to him?
3. do u think his the type of person who u have to bow down to or else u get hit with a lightening bolt?
4.if god is real do u think ur in a whole load of shit?
5.ok lol i learned this on if god is a loving god why des he send people to hell? answer i learned( because god is a loving god but he is also justice u can not change who he is just becuz u say something sin is sin u cant sugar coat it no matter wat..
6.do u think its pointless people try bringing him down? as in his not real, his a hoax um... (well to think about it this way if such a man exsist he created the world and so on why would he be bothered ur
cursing him and say stuff about him) it really wouldnt affect who he is in other terms ur just making urself look like a jackass
he brought back the dead so i think your so called "harsh words" would just slide of like water and not really mean anything
0_0 br right back grans calling i'll finish this later
PERSONALITY QUIZ: WAT TYPE OF GUY WOULD FALL FOR YOU?? _______(who i am)_____________________ your sweet,funny and a kid at heart. your friends would probally say that your a live wire and that you dont like to stay in one place for long and love to have fun and party. ______________________________________ WHAT KIND OF JEWELRY ARE YOU??? _______(i am a necklace)______________ Your perfect item of jewelry is a necklace. A necklace is worn close to the heart, which represents your passion and giving heart. You are a very loving person. _____________________________________ Are You "Complicated"? I am "Never gonna find you fake it" You really know who you are and embrace your unique personality. You like "you the way you are." You don't act differently depending on the situation, whether it's a group of people or one on one, you stay true to yourself ________________________________________ WHAT IS UR AFFINITY?? _________(air)__________________________ You are incredibly intelligent and perceptive. Because you are rational and fair, your friends can come to you with their problems knowing that you will provide unbiased advice with their best interests in mind.Because you are easily bored, you surround yourself with many friends who keep you busy. You can easily adapt to your surroundings, and are always looking for new experiences and things to try.
WHAT TYPE OF KISS ARE YOU?? (my results) ___Steamy and Wet Kiss____ You've got a good balance between thinking with your heart and thinking with your sex-drive. You can get caught up in a temptation but you know when to hold back so you don't completely hurt. _______________________________________________ YOUR PERFECT MAN?? (my results) funny--49% intelligent--10% witty--5% sophisticated--3% romantic--31% sarcastic--3% ______________________________________________ DOSE HE LIKE YOU?? (my results) He is in LUV with you!! you guys are TOTALLY in love ______________________________________________ WHAT DOSE YOUR EYE COLOR MEAN?? (my results) Your brown eyes means wiseness You are very smart, sometimes u can get to your wild side but who dosent. ______________________________________________
lol there lots of people in my life when i get more pictures o thm i'll gladly put it up
.SKY MY WIFE shy and i known each other for 10 years we went to elemantary together,middle school she helped me learn english...she gets mad when she got home from work and found me chilling with guys her excuse was she has a job,every started laughing and i said thats what they all say and everyone burst into laughter gawd love her .LITTLE SISTERS my little ones oR U CAN SAY my mini me'S diamond, sapphire ,and amethyst .LUIS YAY MY EMO DROOL!!! lol luis luis luis always cute no matter what kisses hun miss yea except if you caught something from those girls you play with then i will never touch that .BEST BUDDY SONNY yay my best buddy lol had a crush on his cousins johnny and willam o_o super duper major hottys lol willam is more hotter now tho his 19 drool!!! known these people most of my life
IS it wrong for me to expose to the world what type of man my fahter is....
i know for a fact not all men are the same.. apart of me grew up hating men
as a child i grew up and took the role of my father at the age of 7, he was rude and mean to my mother when she was pregnant, he never helped he go to any of her doctors appointment.. my last brother before he was born i laid my head on my mothers swollen belly my dad came out of the hallway, and i heard him say to my mother "get rid of that thing"...
I know its alot of kids am the eldest of 7 kids, but know one has the right to take a life..i almosted cryed when i look at my mom i could see she almost cryed and she said "i dont know what to do"
i was 12 at this time, i was crushed when she told me couple of years later that she and dad went to go find something that might get rid of the baby..
NO my father was not there for me... he got my mothr pregnant when he was married to another women, he promised he would take care of her, and he accused his first wife of cheating and wasnt sure if my half older brother was even his.. he was in philippines, when i was born i was left with my grandmother at 3months of age later on my father addmitted to my mother that he only used her to get his papers, and his origanal plan was to bring his first wife to america...
now my dad is having an affair with another women now he told my mom that he wants to marry her..this is going to be his third marriage I came to america when i was 5
am crying...i really am writing this it hurts me so bad hearing my father call me names at young age he alwaysed hit me called me names its hurt when ur father calls you a "fucking bitch" usless "mother fucker"... i had a bruise on my face for a week my father hit it wit a shoe over and over before that i remember him dragging me in the house by my hair..told me to shutup because i was crying i was 8 years old at this time i never warmed up to my father i cant help but just cry
i blame he gets mad at me at times cuz i look like my mother i remember my back was to the wall and he just kept kicking me all over my body
i had enough one time and i yelled out i hate you he punched me on my face.. i was always mad at my mother why she never stopped him and just put up with everything he did....
am misrable... my mom keeps saying he will change so i keep forgiving him then when i found out that he was having and affair i broke she was still with him, i was mad becuase i was making breakfast for him and he got mad at me and just hit me calling me a bitch so that day i walked out of the house and moved out i live with my granmother now part of me is still misrable
i feel like so much has been lifted of my shoulder but now when i feel happy at times its makes me sad do i really deserv to be happy am so use to suffering why does it feel so wrong to be happy
LOL ummm..... i havnt wrote a blog in such a long time wow. am alittle rusty, i kinda wish i havnt deleted my other blogs because i wrote them with heart
Anyway some of my closes friends and family been wondering where i have been. well i been in a hotel for the pass days, why? u may ask nooooo i was not there for any wierd reason, i was there visiting my siblings, long story how they got there but
it went like this my father cheated on my mom, blah blah ummm father super abusive beats me and my siblings before. mom got fed up she left they stayed in a foster home jade my brother kicked a 1an a half year old baby
people who stayed there asked my mom and siblings to leave during the middle of night....
so anyway i moved out bout um.. think its been for months already i been living with gran, she is very strict.. when am nervous
i talk and talk...bad habit gran,me and her bf went out to eat and i kinda blurred out that i been drinking for the pass few days
-_- i know bad me.
anyway i cant finish this bog kinda to many things on my mind maybe next blog i can explain more
i have good news and bad news, first of all the anime expo is coming to town. and this year am not gonna miss it
be ready boys for another major nose bleed this year am going this year for a fact i wonderwhat might happen
heres are some pictures from last year is it just me or are nerds getting hotter every years OK AM NOT REALLY SURE WHATS GOING ON ON THIS PIC THE BIGGEST COSTUME PARTY ENJOY CUZ ITS HAPPENING AGAIN THIS YEAR
see i want to get married and the wedding dress is pretty and all but whats under it matters too you know so i need your help picking one out if its ok with you is less really more what do u think?????
does black really go good wit a white wedding dress??? am not really a big fan of gaint poofy princess dresses yucky i want something that represents my favorite element "water" i want it to look like a elegant gentle breeze so the moment when he sees me am the most beautiful thing in his eyes
EVERYONE HAS A WEAKNESS WHATS YOURS i mean look at superman he has krytonite witches have waterand perverted guys have younger girls
mines is emo boys i cant help it, when i see one my eyes get bubbly and i start blushing i cant even look at them i always end up looking at my shoes instead. lol and the worst part is that i dont think theres a cure.... or is there and if there is i dont think i wanna be cured anyways...