I've always...

I look at the sky as my own
and the light always warms my bones
but the light brings the dark in shadow
and somewhere inside I know

It glows in the freezing night
the midwinter snow so white
in its celestial path in the sky
the great hubnester lies

I refuse to fail, to kneel or bow
No power in the 'verse can stop me now
Leading me towards the dawn of day
The stars above illuminate my way

My burden an awful load
my chest holds a heart of gold
in the stories a child is told
a legend amongst the old

it speaks of a legacy
one of me and my family
And I burn for their right to survive
to be alive

"Kuma was a hero who saved the world.
The Legend of hubnesters fight will be told forever"

While listening to the song "Oki Kuma's Adventure" (lyrics above) by Machinae Surpremacy I finally finnished rereading "The World According To Garp" a novel I read in school...
Back then our teacher told us that we would like it if we're a bit older; Actually I liked it even then. I would not dare to claim that I understood all of it even now after rereading it but understanding a book has never been my way of reading I guess. I've always hated to rip a whole thing apart into tiny pieces just to find a hidden message somewhere because the hidden message is always your temporary way of looking at it. The person you are decides what you see or understand.

Enough of it. I surely felt different when I finnished the book for the first time. I felt changed, changed for the better because I knew, kew something about myself I had not known before reading the book.
I have this feeligng right now but not as strong as back then... Guess I'll have to read new books...
Not novels, at least not now. There are better things to do, better things to change, like knowledge.
I have this uneasy feeling that my brain was half asleep for a long time, rusting and that I have to hurry to catch up to this loss...