Like A Teapot

The tragedy of intense but short-lived romantic love, almost always ended by external control, has been the heart and soul of all literature -- of novels, stories, poetry, plays, movies, and opera -- from the time these forms were created. Happiness prevails when neither partner tries to control the other.... But that kind of happiness is a non-seller in the box office and a rare occurrence in life.

Infatuation, one of life's most enjoyable but least lasting experiences, is so strong because the need for power is temporarily subordinated to the desire for romantic love and sex....As soon as the sex gets the least bit routine, external control surfaces and kills the romantic love.... When the infatuation ends, the affairs should end, and it usually does. Trying to keep it going is like beating a dead horse.

Choice theory continues to say: it's what you do in a relationship that counts, you can't control your mate or anyone else.