I don't go to the opera ;-)

kiddie runs a stolen trojan
just to see my hdd
but my server is a honeypot
and i watched all your private pr0n

yesterday there was a party at work and i got drunk a lot, so i woke up with a baddest hangover. then i decided not to call in sick, went to the methadone clinic to drink my dayly dose of 45 mg levomethadon, which equals 90 mg methadone. i use the shit since 14 years now. worse is that i need to quit my benzodiazepine habit. i mustget rid off the shit until beginning of july. cause benzo consuming means i must go to the doc every day to drink the poison. then i went to work, dropped six ativan (tavor) and 4 rivotril. well if i don't get to zero on being testing
i can't go to portugal for a one week job, besides of that my psychologist will then start treating me with ritalin again, that is the only drug that helps me against my bypolarity. what a shit. last year, in october, i tried killing myself with a seventeen days dosage of methadone, combined with 60 pills and lots of alc. but i survived, i only slept two days and then was on turkey again.
i live in munich and since i moved here from west germany (ruhr valley) i get fucked up more and more by german government and all that conservative assholes and 80ies style yuppies.
one good thing happened: we found a new flat, which is much nicer than the dark backyard ground floor flat that makes depressive if you stay longer than 60 minutes in here.

til then,

tiggernix

if you like to play my "diazepam.demo" get it from here:
diazepam2.zip

just unzip, turn sound on and start diazepam.exe




edit: 3 o clock in the night and still no sleep

i get a bit nervous at the moment, i am a short on benzodiazepines. the noctamid and the halcion is all eaten up,
now i have 20 2 mg rivos, a few ativan and 4 xanax 1 mg left. this is not enough to taper off so that means going to
the shrinks again. "doctor please - some more of these.." lol.
well, what to say about me or everything around me? i didn't find any useful or funny links the last days. well, i will
be getting better in blogging from day to day ;-)

greets,
tiggernix

Well, i will see how creative i will be as a blogger.
I come back later, cause i'm at work ATM ;-)

I'm at home now and getting tired and more tired.
'Til now nobody knows about my blog, seems i have to change this.